13 month age gap

Hi,
Wondering if anyone has any tips or advice on how to cope with 2 little ones only 13 months part? I'm due with number 2 in August. I feel like I'm just getting to really know Jack and am scared he will miss out when the new bub arrives.

Also, the practical stuff. How do I make sure I get enough sleep? Can I somehow coordinate sleeps, feeds and baths? What will I do with them when I want to shower? DH is great and will help out when he can but he will have to be working lots to support his family.

I have a 14 month age gap DS was born June 08 and my DD was born in August 09
It hasnt been as hard as I thought it would be!

Having lots of help! in the first few months when everything is new and everyone is getting used to things, but after that I found that things just fell into place. We had a rough time the first 4 months though as DD had terrible reflux and just cried all the time, but we still managed to make things work.

We made sure that DS had a solid routine for bedtime, so I would do his dinner, then DH bathed him and got him ready for bed, story etc
We were a tag team when it came to DD, especially through her really unsettled time.

Now they adore eachother, its so sweet! DS gives DD hugs all the time and she smiles at him whenever she see's him. I love the age gap! I would love to have out next very soon but DH isnt so keen :P and my body really needs time to recover!(I had two C Sections, DS emergency and DD elective).

**I actually found the pregnancy the hardest part! I had MS with both kids, but with DD not so bad, but enough to make me feel like the walking dead, and looking after a 6 month old during that time was horrid. I also got admitted to hospital at 36 weeks with dangerously low iron, and had to have an iron infusion, yuck! So I had felt awful from about 20 weeks-36 weeks with the low iron, that the pills wernt helping.

You will be all good!

Edited by Sheza

Hi - we have a 15 month gap so a wee bit bigger of an age gap.

You will definitly notice the difference in your confidence when you have your second baby - which is a huge weight off your shoulders and because you already KNOW that you will be tired with a newborn in the house, it doesn't feel as unexpected and difficult.

My eldest got used to our new addition very quickly and we had no problems there at all. Just make sure you have a few activities and snacks on hand for your toddler for when you are feeding baby. Also make some snacks for yourself! I used to find it easier to get dinner prepped in the mornings so that if my afternoons went to custard, dinner was essentially taken care of. Crock pot got used a lot too!

I have always bathed the kids together and they used to have day sleeps at the same times too. I never thought ot would be possible to do that, and it didnt happen every day but it did!

It's a tough journey but totally worth while.

Congrats!

We have a 13 month age gap and although it wasn't planned like that, I wouldn't have it any other way, now. I love it.

It was hard to begin with, especially as Chloe hadn't started walking when Ollie was born, so I was having to lug two littlies around. But I made sure I had heaps of support, and DH took several weeks off work to help look after Chloe while I got breastfeeding established.

My advice is to get your older child as involved as you can from the beginning. Chloe just loves coming and giving Ollie a kiss and a pat on the back when he's crying, and she knows that it's her job to help comfort and care for him, as part of this family. It stops her grumping that the attention is on Ollie, because we are involving her and making her an important role as his big sister. She absolutely adores her little brother. She likes giving him cuddles and helping him to have his bottle, finding toys and his dummy for him when he's upset, etc.

One thing that really helped her as she got to about 15 months to 2 years was her own "Baby". She loves copying what I'm doing with Ollie - wrapping it in blankets, rocking it, singing to it, patting it on the back, etc. I used to give her an empty jar and spoon, and set her baby up with a bib next to Ollie while I was feeding him, when he started on solids. She found it so much fun to "feed" her baby when I was feeding Ollie, and it gave her something to do instead of fussing that the attention wasn't on her.

One thing that's important I think is that she has a few special toys of her own, that she doesn't have to share if she doesn't want to... like her glo-bug and her my little ponies. They are her special toys. And Ollie has a couple that Chloe knows are his special toys as well.

Now that Ollie is getting much more interactive, it's getting really fun. Chloe absolutely loves when she can make her adoring little brother laugh and smile, and (most of the time) enjoys sharing things with him. Of course she gets a bit annoyed when he starts playing with something that she is playing with, and now says "no, ollie, no no no... that is CHLOE'S toy", lol.

Overall it was not as hard as I expected it to be, and I absolutely love the age gap and how close Chloe and Ollie are. They love each other's company. It was hard work in the early days, as with any newborn, so make sure you have lots of support for when you are getting breastfeeding established, and so you can try and get some rest (it's hard to rest while baby is sleeping, with another baby to look after)!

All the best, it's an awesome journey and you will love it