Coffee Catchup 21st October with Dorothy Waide

Hi Dorothy,
Thank you for an informative talk today.
My 13 week old son never sleeps more than 45 mins for his daytime sleeps. In saying that though I don't try to resettle him as you suggested today after the 45mins. I feed him every two hours during the day and am exclusively breastfeeding. He has a bath at 5 every night then is always asleep by 6.30. He then wakes again at 12, then 5am. Our day usually starts at 7am (in terms of getting up)
Do you have any suggestions on improving any of the above? It for the most part works, however as the day goes on he becomes harder to get to sleep. We only put him to sleep in his cot.
Would appreciate your thoughts. Thank you again
Tracey

Hi Dorothy

If bubs wakes after one sleep cycle and you need to resettle in the push chair how long would you trying rocking the push chair back and forth before trying another technique? 20-30 mins?
Would you attempt to shush/cup in push chair? I am just thinking it would logistically be hard to get bubs on his side or tummy to undertake cupping resettling especially when he is strapped in.

On a light hearted note any tips on dealing with the public looking at you disapproving for the disruption :)

Thanks

Hi Tracey
Babies need two nutrients sleep and food and ideally at 13 weeks you are teaching him to resettle during his nap times. At 13 weeks his awake time would ideally be approximately 1 1/2 to 1 3/4's stretching out to when he is six months to 3 hours.

When he wakes I would feed him and then 15 minutes before going for a nap I would offer him a top up. This will not cause a feed/sleep association as long as you feed, swaddle or sleeping bag and then into his cot.

When he wakes at the 45 minute mark I would suggest that you try and resettle by going in as soon as he stirs and help him find his sleep again. I do this with cupping and shushing and it is easier if you roll him onto his side. YOu will need to do the cupping and shushing until he goes back to sleep. YOu can also do this in arms if he does not re settle in his cot.   

If you are wanting him to resettle during the night then you need to teach him during his nap times

Hope that helps
Dorothy

Hi I would always try and resettle in the cot, however if you are out and about in the pram I would attempt to resettle the same amount of time as if he was in his cot at home.

IF he doesnt settle with movement, then I would tend to pick him up and settle in arms, cover him with a muslin and do the cupping and shushing in arms. This way it stops the public looking at your disapproving as baby is in arms
Dorothy

Hi Ladies
Thank you for all your questions and hopefully the answers will help you. It was lovely to meet you all at the OHBaby Coffee Catchup.

Remember before you do anything STOP, THINK, and ACT – work out what you are doing, why you are doing, and what you are trying to accomplish and then act.

Remember YOU are the baby’s mum and so listen to your heart and instinct.   Yes, we all don’t do it by the book, or get it right the first time, but you need to make ‘mistakes’ to get it right for you.   It’s a time of learning a little person’s personality and figuring out what works for your home life.

If you have the time I would love to see you pop over to http://www.facebook.com/BabyWithin
and 'like' it. You can then keep up with information that I post from time to time or hear from other mothers who write on the wall. Also there is a section you can leave your comments on as well.

Please remember as a parent or carer that you should understand and acknowledge that Dorothy is NOT a licensed medical doctor or other licensed medical provider and the information that I share with you has come from experience and working with numerous families and babies and toddlers

HI Monique
Yes, I also had issues trying to post replies earlier in the week but seems to be working okay so if anyone else had these issues please retry and let me know that the post was late due to the system.

At 9 weeks as he is not settling in his cot I would do this in arms. So basically this is what his routine would look like.   Also at 9 weeks pull the 1 1/2 hours back to 1 1/4 and see if that helps. Hold it there for ten days and if it working better then hold for another and then stretch out to the 1 1/2 so he is there by 12 weeks.

Wakes, feeds, cuddle/play, top up (15 mins before going back to bed), swaddle and into cot.

Leave for an appropriate time - if he is just lying there and not grizzling leave for up to 20 minutes and then go in and turn on his side and cup. Here you have two options cup until he is in a deep sleep or pick him up and engulf him and do the cupping in arms.   Leave him to sleep in your arms and then when ever he stirs start the cupping again so eventually he learns to stay asleep.    Once you have accomplished teaching him to stay asleep the next goal would be to do it in the cot.

During the day you ideally need to feed anywhere from 3 1/4 hours to 4 hours so you would wake him to do this. Once a day okay to give him a longer nap as long as he has had enough feeds.

Yes, very normal to be doing this as at his age the routine is not about what the time is but that he is up for approx 1 1/4 hours and napping for approx 1 1/2 hours.   His awake time as I mentioned above would be he wakes, you feed, cuddle/play, top up and then into bed. His napping time will consist of getting him to sleep and staying asleep
Dorothy