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KitKat 
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Joined: 22 August 2008
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 Topic: Going in for seconds?
Posted: 06 June 2011 at 12:35pm |
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Hi all,
I had antenatal depression (in hindsight) and PND.
We are thinking about having another baby. Am I mad? (apart from the obvious!)
Have any of you had a second baby, and how did you manage the depression?
Did you take meds?
Did it get worse?
Was it all much harder than the first??
Im half hoping itll all just be as hard as it is now, and that I wont have time to think about it!? I dont want to go into this with my eyes closed.
I guess any experiences would be good to hear.
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ElfsMum
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Joined: 04 June 2007
Location: Christchurch
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Posted: 06 June 2011 at 1:37pm |
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I didnt really have much time to dwell on it all when i was pregnant the second time..as with the first i sat around thinking a lot but with Liam didnt have time lol...
In hindsight i was depressed since I lost my first baby at 12 weeks.. but didnt get diagnosed till 24 weeks with number two..I went on meds as the risks were only minute and all in first trimester.. and it made a massive difference.. so consequently I didn't get any worse and steadily got better to now where I am doing great!
I found it much harder with two i won't lie..but my second only slept 45mins during the day and I had to do every night all night by myself after a c section and he still doesnt sleep through at 16 months lo...but I wouldn't change anything.. having two children is amazing:) SO my advice would be to consider how you feel about it all go into it positively and hope for the best and if not deal with things as they come up....and have a support system..
Edited by ElfsMum
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Mum to two amazing boys!
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SpecialK
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Joined: 29 August 2008
Location: New Zealand
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Posted: 10 June 2011 at 9:00pm |
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Kat, I didn't have PND but like a lot of people I had horrible days when the baby wouldn't sleep and wouldn't stop crying and I thought I was going to loose the plot!! So I thought really hard about what I found most difficult with H, and what would have been helpful and before M was born I had a lot more support in place.
It was hard, I won't lie, it still is sometimes. Yesterday I was THAT woman a the supermarket with two crying children growling at both of them!
So for me that things that helped/help are:
A decent double buggy so I can get out of the house. An 'emergency kit' under said buggy so we don't get caught out ( nappies, wipes, flat nappy, blanket, bibs, plasters, hand sanitiser, a dummy, snacks).
Planned meals for the week and/or meals in the freezer. This includes a whole lot of toddler meals - like tuna pasta, soups etc frozen in individual servings. And a whole lot of baking - coookie dough etc.
Set activities every day for the toddler and have the baby fit into it - it was a lifesaver to get out of the house with H and take him to things he loves like music. M slept in the buggy or on me.
Don't beat yourself up over things like too much TV for the toddler (I get educational DVDs) or formula for the baby.
Sorry this is turning into an essay... I hope it helps. It's been hard, but also amazing watching the two of them play and cuddle and laugh at each other.
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KitKat
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Joined: 22 August 2008
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Posted: 11 June 2011 at 2:13pm |
Thanks heaps guys 
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mummytobesep08
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Location: Christchurch
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Posted: 26 June 2011 at 2:43pm |
I don't think you're mad for thinking about having a second baby
We had a horrific time with PND and PTSD after DD1 was born but have happily gone back for seconds! I think knowing what helped last time and what we will do different this time is what makes us confident enough to be doing it. Of course we'll have moments of doubt, as everyone does, but it'll be right
I'm not taking meds at the moment (came off while TTC) but have heard it can greatly reduce the risk of getting AND/PND again so would be happy to resume them if needed
Good luck!
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Angel babes '07 & '10- <3 <3
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RuthyH
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Posted: 12 July 2011 at 12:47pm |
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Hi I'm pregnant with number 2 now, due in September. It was unplanned pregnancy but I was in recovery from PND when I fell pregnant. At first I was totally freaked and wondered if we should even go ahead. Plus in the first trimester some of the insomnia came back and that freaked me out too - I wondered if it was starting up again so soon.
I spoke to my psychiatrist and he said that the chances of getting PND again are 5 x more likely if you don't prepare yourself and half as likely to get it again (as someone who's never had it) if you do prepare yourself. Preparing yourself apparently means making sure you have a good support network, talking to your GP, midwife etc and responding to any danger signs quickly. I am not on meds now and after first trimester have been feeling overall really well. But I have my supports set up and a plan in place with hubby in case things go awry.
It is a really scary prospect having number 2 but in the end I feel like even if it does go bad again it won't be as bad cos I know what to do to help myself this time. And in the end it's an investment in having the family I want for the future, even if it is a tough few years getting there. I figure if I let the illness stand in the way of what I want in my life I have let the illness win.
Hope this helps, good luck
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Rosesmum
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Joined: 20 July 2011
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Posted: 26 July 2011 at 7:50am |
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I am also planning to get pregnant again soon after 3/4 months on prozac and now, 3/4 months off. I think that if I let PND hold me back from doing what we want for our family then that would be very sad. I would recognise the signs sooner next time and use ADs sooner if needs be.
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Babe
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Posted: 01 September 2011 at 11:26am |
I know this is abit late but thought I'd stic my 2c in anyway
I had PND, PTSD and postnatal psychosis so the first couple of years after Jake were a freaking nightmare but we went back for another round and like others have said having a plan was super-helpful. I found my whole hormonal system settled down after I got pregnant and it was a quick trip out of the depression tunnel and into some semblence of normality and its just continued to get better. I didn't have any PND issues after Tyler was born, though the lack of sleep (he was a really sh*tty sleeper) rocked the boat slightly for abit but we stuck to the plan and we're going back for a third shortly so y'know... we're probably mad too 
I agree with what Rosesmum said - letting PND hold you back from what you want for your family is sad. Make a plan, don't worry about being over-prepared coz theres no such thing, envisage the life you want and don't lose sight of that!
Hope to see a ticker counting down soon
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Going in for seconds?
