How do i...

Hi,
Just had a thought, hoq do i get my 19month old stepdaughter used to the fact she is going to have to share me and her daddy with another baby? shes very very protective of us and hates having us near ANY other baby, she has to come and put herself between us and that baby

I know i have a while yet and that a lot of things will change in 4-5months, but im just wondering how i should start preparing her, we have her close to 5o% of the time, and her birth mum doesnt have any other kids to, and she is the 1st grandchild in both families, so gets a little spoilt, but we are just starting to get anxiouos that she wont cope with the new baby!

Thanks heaps in advance

Hey mybelly, no great words of advice here - maybe more mums will read it if you post again in the parenting or general area? With a heading like getting #1 ready for #2?

maybe talking to ehr about the baby and get ehr a wee baby doll to learn to look after.
Haleigh is 21 months next week and we are due to have our baby any day now and she has her own wee baby dolls that she looks after and we teach her to treat them like a real baby, we're still nervous at how she will react when hes actually ehre but she talks to my bump and rubs it and cuddles it.
I think so long as they know they're not being replaced adn that they are always going to be loved the same they should be fine.

Introduce the baby into normal conversation, make references part of every day life (even when she's not around, just so you are in the habit of it when she is there). If you decide to find out the gender and have a name chosen that you are willing for others to hear (or choose a unisex nickname that you can continue to use after Baby's arrival) then call Baby by that name around DSD so that she becomes familiar with it.

Josiah was 18mths old when Xavier was born. I included him in what was going on as much as possible, chatting about "Baby's kicking lots now! Do you want to feel the kicking?" and things like that. Josiah ignored most of it, but I know he got the general idea. Nat and I would talk to him about "Baby in Mummy's tummy" and say "Say 'Hello!' Baby." and pat my tummy. Kiya did it too, and Josiah would copy her. We found out we were having a boy, and so from then on we talked about Xavier... by the time I was due, I could say to Josiah "Say 'Hello' to Xavier" and he would pat my tummy with a big smile. Often Xavier would kick back! Josiah loved hearing the heartbeat at my midwife appointments and I would talk to him about how that was his little brother's heart etc.

I don't think you're thinking too far ahead, I think you're right on the money, starting to prapare her for baby's arrival already, especially with what you said about her being so protective of you two.  What about a special doll for her?  If she gets the doll and she and you can play together (doing the sorts of things that you'll be doing with baby - bathing, changing, etc) and you can talk to her as you both play about the baby in your tummy.  And would a special job or 2 help?  Like her job could be to kiss baby before nap times, or choose baby's socks, or something.