boisterous baby boy & understanding NO!

Hi there,

I do hope someone can help me out with some advice here. I have an adorable baby boy who is almost nine months old. Over the last couple of weeks he has started to get what I can only describe as a wee bit boisterous to say the least.

Initially he started grabbing at my prescription glasses and no matter how much I say "No" in a stern voice he thinks it is a game now and is doing even more to the point I am now wearing my contact lenses every day as I am terrified he is going to break my glasses (and I really can't afford to replace them at present). In addition to this he has taken to grabbing hold of my hair albeit to give me kisses but again he is getting really rough to the point where he is grabbing fistfuls of my hair out!.

This week he has learnt to undo the tabs on his nappy and quite literally lies there on the change table and smirks at me as he is pulling the tabs despite again me saying no.

The straw that has really broken the camels back this week is that he has now started to pull the hair and clothes of other children at coffee group and is generally quite rough with them.

In all honesty I never imagined myself as a Mother being in this position as I am a mature woman and cetainly not a walk over however my little boy is only nine months old and I feel like I am constantly saying no to him and getting nowhere, is this down to his young age or am I doing something wrong.

I so don't want to be a Mother who walks into the room and all the other Mum's move their babies as mine is a "little monster" (as I affectionately call him)!, I need to instill discipline but what is the best way to do this for a baby of such a young age.

I would really value the feedback of other Mum's who have maybe expereinced something similar.

Thanks Ladies in advance

One thing that does help is 'blocking' When he goes to grab another baby etc, instead of grabbing him and moving him away, try putting your open palm between them and saying Stop. Also distraction helps me sometimes. When he is going for the cupboards I will do the block, then take him to his toys and sit with him for a little bit.
It is frustrating though isn't it!
It in no way means you are a bad parent. Some babies just have very strong wills.

Edited by kellie

I use the word Gentle a lot, with other kids and remove him if he is getting too excited with other kids.   Pretty much the only thing that I've found works is baby proofing EVERYTHING because otherwise my whole day is spent using the word no and thats not very fun. And with the glasses I just put him down if he tries to go for my glasses and say no. But I do get warning because he looks at them for quite a while first before he grabs. I've found a lot of it is the attention he gets and if I ignore him he does get bored quite easily. Boys do like to push the boundaries.

they dont really get NO. distraction is good and telling them to be gentle and showing them how to play gently is good also. they quite often dont know they are hurting someone and need to be shown how to play appropriately. so maybe if he is pulling your hair, say ow that hurts mummy! if you want kisses, cuddle mummy... and give him a cuddle to show him what you want. you will have to do it a few times of course, but NO wont help as they dont yet understand what that means for them.

Oh you poor thing! My little man is at a similar age and does the same things!

We also say 'gentle' lots and show him what it means, with 'no' I either tap him on the knuckle with my finger at the same time as saying no in a stern voice (if he is reaching for something e.g. computer cords, DVDs) or remove him or both. And distract him straight away with something else.

You just have to be consistent with him, even though he won't know the meaning of word he'll pick up what he is being told by the tone of your voice.

Good luck!

I agree with using gentle as well. Jackson can sometimes get a bit rough, mainly with me and DH thank goodness, and we say gentle to him and he settles down. We havent said 'no' to him yet so he wouldnt understand that. But saying Gentle works well here.

Blocking is a good technique - I'm using it with the glasses at the mo too! I thought we'd got past the fascination, but it's started up again in the last week or so. Hand goes up, blocks, and "don't touch", she does understand and usually gives up after 2-3 goes.

We use phrases like "be gentle", "be careful" a LOT, DD is always into EVERYTHING and can be a bit rough and tumble!

My son has always been a rough and tumble little boy, he STILL yanks my glasses off my face, and has only recently really started listen when we say no(he is nearly 20 months)
A 9 month old wont understand no, so I would just move his hands away and say "gentle".
DS went through a hitting phase, and we started saying "be Gentle" or "Loves" and show him how to be nice.

Nowdays, he gets told No about 1000 times a day and he understands, and will leave what he is doing and we find something else for him to play with.
He is sometimes rough with his baby sister, but not on purpose, and we say "Love for bella" and he will hug her or pat her gently.

Emily was very similar with my glasses almost overnight she developed an obbsession, I also used the blocking.

She laughs at me whenever i say No and carrys on doing what ever it was i told her no for, However when her grandfather says no she stops instantly and sometimes crys.... ive told him i may need a recording lol.

we also say gentle alot especially with the dog.

Good Luck