New Posts New Posts RSS Feed - The nature of the breastfed baby
  FAQ FAQ  Forum Search   Events   Register Register  Login Login


Forum LockedThe nature of the breastfed baby

 Post Reply Post Reply
Author
FionaS View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 17 April 2007
Location: Auckland
Points: 5117
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote FionaS Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: The nature of the breastfed baby
    Posted: 14 December 2009 at 6:11pm
Not sure if it is just me but I find breastfed babies to be very unpredictable. Is it just me?

Gabrielle was a very unsettled baby and feeding was our lifesaver - she was always happy when breastfeeding and we had so many precious moments. It was the only time she was still, calm and happy. Ashley is a very very happy baby so breastfeeding, though precious, isn't quite as special.

I love breastfeeding. It is so convenient & easy (for us) and I know we are lucky to be able to do it. However, I find the unpredictability hard. Every night is different, every day starts at a different time, every nap is a different length. Some days we have 2 hourly feeds, others 3.5 hourly. It isn't as simple as giving a 200mL bottle before bed...some nights 3 feeds are required, others it is just a quick 5min thing. I naturally like routine but it just seems impossible. Now I know this isn't really a bad thing...it is just a season...a precious season that will be over all too soon.

However, just wanted to vent. They say breast is best but they don't say it is hard. I never experienced the "hard" bit until now.

Just wanted to share that...perhaps you want to join in the thread, perhaps you will feel encouraged that although in some ways breastfeeding is 'easy' (if you are blessed enough to be able to do it), it can also be hard.

Hope this doesn't lead to a debate about bottle/breast as it isn't about that....
Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley
Back to Top
Sponsored Links


Back to Top
Bizzy View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 10974
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bizzy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 December 2009 at 6:20pm
i dont really have anything to compare it with not ever having bottle fed any of the kids... but mine always put themselves into a routine. eden for example (cause being the last one i can remember better !) refused to have any more than four feeds a day, and no matter how hard i tried to wake her for a dream feed if she wasnt ready it was damn impossible.

sure in the beginning it was a bit unpredictable but i imagine if you were demand feeding - wether it be bottle or breast - it would be.. maybe i am wrong tho!

Back to Top
FionaS View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 17 April 2007
Location: Auckland
Points: 5117
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote FionaS Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 December 2009 at 6:29pm
I aim to work on a flexible, EAS routine. So we follow a pattern but feed when she is hungry. So that means anywhere between 2 and 4 hourly. I can't for the life of me see how I could stick to a more structured (time-wise) routine than that as when Ash is hungry she is hungry.    And some night she sleeps 11 hours others she wakes 3 hourly so every day starts at a different time.

I'm not looking for answers...just sharing :)
Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley
Back to Top
Bizzy View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 10974
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Bizzy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 December 2009 at 6:30pm
wasnt giving any answers, just thought i was sharing back...

Edited by Bizzy

Back to Top
palomino View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 27 July 2008
Location: North Island
Points: 1243
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote palomino Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 December 2009 at 6:35pm
il share too then. Yup up until about 6months i think b was so all over the show. one night would sleep through then next would be up 5 times. something that helped one night wouldnt the next. I dont know if thats differnet to a bottle baby but yea found it really hard. Still demand feeding so sometimes im feeding twice a day others a whole lot more!
Back to Top
MrsMojo View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 18 March 2008
Location: Wellington
Points: 8202
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrsMojo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 December 2009 at 7:09pm

I fed on demand with M but I took that a bit too literally and fed her anytime she demanded anything, whether she needed a feed or not.  This turned her into a snack feeder and IMO this is why her feeding was all over the show and we had no semblence of a routine.

I like routines and so once breastfeeding was established (around 8wks old) I put Andrew into one.   I start the day at the same time every day (which sadly means I have to get up early every day *sigh* and sometimes have to wake Andrew but in the long run it makes it far easier to plan my days).  It doesn't matter if he had a night feed at 5am I will still get up to give him his first day feed at 7am.  His second day feed is due at 11am after his morning nap but if he gets grizzly anytime from 10:30am I know it's due to hunger and I'll feed him.  The next feed is due at 3pm after his afternoon nap and then he has his evening feed at 6pm and a dream feed at 10:30pm.

It was so easy putting him into a routine, just a matter of setting my alarm for the first feed and stretching him out for the second, and it makes life so easy - I can plan activities for us knowing when Andrew will eat or sleep or want to be up and playing and therefore knowing what to bring for him.  It also freed up time for Michaela because I'm not spending half my day trying to feed Andrew or settle him on the off chance that's what he needs. 

I used a routine from Tizzie Hall's book Save Our Sleep which was recommended to me by Louise from the Sleepstore when I had major settling/sleeping issues with a 10mo Michaela.  I think much of the advice in the book is rubbish (just IMO) but the sample routines are great.

Back to Top
Joscia View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 03 October 2007
Points: 522
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Joscia Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 December 2009 at 7:09pm
Like Bizzy, I don't have anything to compare it to, but would definitely agree with the unpredictability. DS is in a routine of sorts - feeding roughly 3hrly - but he'll often just refuse a feed, or to finish a feed for no apparent reason.

And, also like Bizzy, there is NO way I can get him to feed more than he wants to. I've found it's just a case of rolling with it and trusting the fact that there he'll take what he needs and not go hungry.

Having said that, I also breast feeding. It's been really easy for us - which I'm incredibly grateful for - plus I'm so glad I don't have to fuss around with all the paraphernalia that goes with bottle feeding (hats off to those who do - I'm way too lazy to deal with all that!!)

DS has just got his first 2 teeth, and the number of people who have started asking when I'm going to wean him is crazy. Everyone seems to assume that's 'what you do.' But I have no desire or plan to stop. (Also partly because I'm scared of piling weight back on when I do )

(Sorry - got a bit OT there!!)
Back to Top
peanut butter View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 20 February 2007
Points: 8044
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote peanut butter Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 December 2009 at 8:24pm
I would agree....but I thought it was just babies ...and that that was practice for toddlerhood

Josica, I am with you....I dont want to stop but everyone is asking me why I havent already...mind you...if he doesnt stop grazing my nipple (not grazing on ) with his teeth, we might be stopping soon...its split and friggen sore)
Back to Top
Troods View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 12 July 2008
Location: Papakura
Points: 1101
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Troods Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 December 2009 at 9:38pm
*puts up hand to share and say "Yeah I totallly agree with you FionaS"*

DD's feeds were all over the place too, especially being a prem (and an IUGR babe to boot) so I demand fed her. They had her in a feeding "routine" while she was in NICU, but even the nurses commented on how she was a bit all over the place once I started BFing her after a couple of weeks. She also tired easily being so small, so sometimes feeds would be short and sweet before she would get sleepy again, then next feed would roll around again after only an hour, then sometimes it would be a marathon feeding session on the couch for almost 2 hours and she would sleep for 3. We also gave her bottled EBM some feeds so DH could feed her but even then maybe an hour later she would want boob again. Being out and about with her was tricky in the early days, especially if I spent most of the time with her attached to my boobs. By the time she was about 4 months old it settled more into a "routine" but still unpredictable - no specific feeding times, and evenings were still a nightmare. It was blimmin hard work. But still I stuck with it and managed to exclusively BF her until 6 months until I decided I'd had enough and it was wearing me out. Reluctantly I started to supplement a couple of day feeds with formula but unfortunately she decided she didn't want to take the bottle again. Eventually she did and things started to get better routine wise and I felt like a weight had been lifted. I still wanted to keep BFing most of her feeds and her night feeds, so stuck with that until she was about 11 months when she lost interest in BF altogether. The bedtime feed was the last one to go, and I wasn't as sad about it as I thought I would be, despite the hard and tiring road it was in the first few months.   From 6 months the BF feeds were a little more predictable, but there were still moments where they would be all over the place, especially if she was having a growth spurt, or teething or just generally not feeling 100%.

I am hoping to be able to exclusively BF my next baby, and if she isn't a premmie hopefully things will settle into more of a routine a bit more easily. But as these little ones are so unpredictable who can say that just because she might be full term I'll have happy dream baby that feeds according to the book right? I guess I'll just have to keep an open mind and prepare myself for the possibility I might have another unpredictable little feeder on my hands.


Missed MC July 2011
Back to Top
Nikki View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 02 October 2003
Location: West Auckland
Points: 2279
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Nikki Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 14 December 2009 at 10:00pm
Completely agree! The bottle fed bubs I know are alot more predictable - the bottle is made up "when its time" and bub has as much as they need, then wait til "its time" again. Jake was more of a routine bub so by 3 months I could predict within 30mins when he would need to feed / exactly when he would wake etc - he still loves routine now. Morgan on the other hand is random as they come! Very cruisy though - and now at 5.5 months is finally more predictable - but her naps are still all over the show, which affects feeds of course. Even when they are getting more predictable, growth spurts are so much harder to deal with than a bottle fed bub - you can't just add another scoop if they want more!! haha. And you never know exactly how much they've had so have to assume they are hungry again if showing signs.

I think its "possible" to get BF bubs into a routine, but so much hard work, and some bubs are very resistent to doing what the book says! Jake would sleep far more than the book said, and Morgan not enough (which both affect feed times).

But much as its draining and can be a pain - I still find it more convenient (and very grateful it is easy for me too). Although miss nosey is getting harder to feed in public now!!!

Just wanted to share too, cos I agree with your post!

Edited by Nikki
DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs)
Back to Top
SMoody View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 09 January 2007
Location: New Zealand
Points: 1999
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SMoody Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 December 2009 at 9:45am
I find demand feeding easier again. No need to watch the clock, no need to plan around feeds ect.

As for routine for me I see them having a routine. Their routine. Might not be the routine I would prefer but they are in their own.

McKayla at 1 week was feeding every 2 hours. Then the second week on a Monday she changed her routine and did every 3 hours and then the third week every 4 hours. Then the week after that it was back to every 2 hours then 3 then 4 until she settled on every 3 hours during day and 4 hours at night. It was seriously a big huge joke as every Monday on the dot she would change the routine.

Andrew on the other hand seems to be all over the place. He has sort of a rough one but not to the T. And I find it way easier. He is hungry I feed. But then again he feeds a full feed in 15 minutes and usual feeds during the day is like 8. He does wake up still at night and does that every 3 hours as such.

I love organising ect but I do not like watching a clock. But if you find this is a bit hectic why not try what Mrs Mojo did and see if you can get her a bit more in a routine that can work for you?


Back to Top
mummyofprinces View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 10 February 2008
Location: Hibiscus Coast
Points: 8627
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummyofprinces Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 December 2009 at 10:45am
I am only now getting some predictability with Jake. That was the hardest thing about bf IMO.

He has in the last 2 weeks dropped 2 feeds of his own accord which has helped I think. While its not the same time for every feed every day I can now gauge how long before he will need the next one. Speaking of, he has just woken from a 2.15 hour nap (which is very unusual) and is hungry!



Back to Top
Mamma2N View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 15 February 2009
Points: 908
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mamma2N Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 December 2009 at 10:49am
I have to say I loved the unpredictability! Although that said, I am a very unorganised person, who can't stand routine I love that one day is quite different from the last, means we're not stuck on baby ground-hog day!

I trusted like SMoody, that eventually DD would find her own little schedule and sure enough by 6.5mths our days have settled down. Each day still isn't identical from the last but they generally follow some sort of pattern.

Most of all, what I love with demand feeding is having a very flexible baby who is happy to have a wee top up when it is convenient for me and also wait a little longer if feeding isn't convenient (ie. when I'm driving). I couldn't stand having to stick to a strict routine, I know I'd fail horribly with that!
Back to Top
Jam08 View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 13 April 2008
Points: 116
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jam08 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 15 December 2009 at 3:11pm
I haven't read all the replies but I agree that at the beginning the unpredictabilty was hard. Bubs needed feed the moment he woke whether he'd had a short sleep or a long sleep and no matter where we happened to be. I found this tiring and at times frustrating, especially as he took an hour to fed for a long time. I would often drive to town (I live in the country) and would spend most of the day in the feeding room. I would watch other mothers come and go and just keep feeding! Anyway, for me it did eventually get much faster and more predictable.

I agree with Mamma2N. We have an extremely loose routine and I love it as we can do anything at any time of the day and it doesn't muck up sleep or feeding times.

All the best with the feeding!
Back to Top
 Post Reply Post Reply

Forum Jump Forum Permissions View Drop Down

Forum Software by Web Wiz Forums® version 11.10
Copyright ©2001-2017 Web Wiz Ltd.

This page was generated in 1.047 seconds.