And then there was pain

Ill join u there cept i have mine through my whole cycle at the moment and to get scanned is gonna set me back $180 - $200!!!!!!! Its frikken insane!!!

Id go back and see your specialist if i were you coz something doesnt sound right!

It doesn't feel right either to be honest. I'm going to wait it out until the end of this cycle and see how my period is, and then go back. It will have been almost 3 months since the operation by then.

I wonder if perhaps it is the BDing? But my specialist did say that we were good to go once my first cycle started after the surgery (basically giving myself a month to heal).

Anyway, in the meantime I'm just going to concentrate on my health and quality of life. I want a child, so much, but also important is my state of mind and my marriage. I got seriously depressed early this year, and it was so hard on Al and it's so easy to drive yourself into the ground over TTC, especially when there are complications.

You poor thing having pain your whole cycle - at least I get about 10 days off after my first few days of my period, and before ovulation. It does drive you nutty though, doesn't it? Just not being able to get away from it. I was climbing the walls last night, and was in tears. I was handling the pain, it was just frustration.

I'm very lucky that I have health insurance, so whilst I have to cough up for my ultrasounds, I do get it back.

It's really funny though that the best thing for it is heat. I can swallow enough panadol to sink a battle ship, but for relief, it's the good 'ol wheat sack - every time!!

On, and on the QT ...a friend of mine is a nurse, and she has endo also. Apparently *ahem* a ventolin inhaler if you can get your hands on one can really take the edge off, being a muscle relaxant. You didn't hear that from me though ...

Thanks guys

Unfortunately today all the reps are out of the office on an xmas fishing trip (nice for some!), so can't get away from the office for an appointment, and then the next 2 days I am on a First Aid course, and then it's the weekend, and then I may as well wait until AF!

It's funny the difference between talking to people who understand and people who don't - platitudes from people who have no idea means nothing, but just hearing you say Lou that that is how you felt makes me feel a bit lighter. And that is how I feel too - I realised last night that there is actually nothing I can do to change it - no amount of temping or anything else is going to change what's going on inside, so I'm best just to concentrate on healing

Thanks Lou

You're right - it's hard for us to hear them try to help, and they don't understand, so don't know why it's hard for us ...when my SIL told us they were going to start TTC, I said to Al, before I could stop myself, "Oh. That means they'll have had two babies before we've even managed one and we've been TTC the whole time." My SIL said "Well, that means you can have all our stuff becasue we won't need it any more". Uh huh. Yip. *That* helps! Her intentions were good, but ...well ...argh!

I must admit that since I started temping and everything else this cycle (with a hiss and a roar! I was so determined that it was all going to work this month!), I haven't had a good night's sleep. Isn't that funny? I wake constantly, and can't get to sleep or relax. I feel as though I *need* to do the charts so that I have them if we go to a fertility clinic, and then I worry about that ... And then, of course, I feel like a complete goose

So, after having a good talk to Al last night, I decided to just take things as they come over the next few months. The main thing is to heal, and it's just taking a bit longer than we thought.

Al said to me that it was the two of us before this, and if it's just the two of us after this, then it'll be ok.

The saying "Good things take time" drove me insane!!!! I could have decked the next person that said that to me when i was TTC!

At the end of the day ginger you know what is right for you so do what you feel is right I hope you feel better soon