New Posts New Posts RSS Feed - Going to sleep at night
  FAQ FAQ  Forum Search   Events   Register Register  Login Login


Forum LockedGoing to sleep at night

 Post Reply Post Reply Page  12>
Author
fire_engine View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 03 November 2007
Points: 6260
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote fire_engine Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: Going to sleep at night
    Posted: 25 January 2009 at 9:01pm
Daniel is now pretty good at going to sleep during the day, but evenings aren't that fun. He tends to cry for 1/2 an hour plus after going to bed, often on and off, but when it's on, it's on - sobbing, tears, chest heaving (all designed to break a mother's heart ).

Our routine is
5ish - BF and solids dinner
Play
6ish - shower
6.30 BF
6.45 FF in room with dad, 2x story books then into bed, dummy, fan on.

Any ideas why it's worst in the evenings? Any tips on what to do? We're currently doing a version of controlled crying, going in periodically, never leaving him for more than 5 minutes.
Mum to two wee boys
Back to Top
Sponsored Links


Back to Top
busymum View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
Points: 12236
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote busymum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 January 2009 at 9:11pm
Is he overtired? Too hot? Still hungry?
Back to Top
fire_engine View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 03 November 2007
Points: 6260
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote fire_engine Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 25 January 2009 at 9:54pm
Not too hungry - emphatically refuses his bottle.
We have the fan on him, and his chest temp seems OK (and it's no hotter than it is in the middle of the day).
Maybe overtired - during the day, he's not usually up for more than 2 hours, and it's about that at night too.

Why can't babies come with an instruction manual? They're weird wee creatures
Mum to two wee boys
Back to Top
JessDub View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 29 February 2008
Location: Hamilton
Points: 323
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote JessDub Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 9:09am
Sounds like he is overtired OR not quite ready for sleep.

It's a fine line but my son will cry heartedly for both reasons. Some nights we get it right and don't hear a peep - ahhh. It does help to close the door and turn up the telly. Listening to the crying will only wreck your head.

Another thing which my plunket nurse told me about is the 'witching hour' - normally between 5 and 7, all babies and wee kids play up.


Back to Top
fire_engine View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 03 November 2007
Points: 6260
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote fire_engine Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 10:04am
One thing I forgot to say is that often when we go in to pick him up, he'll stop crying and start looking round the room, smiling at us (or the curtains ) - so maybe not tired enough??

The emotional part of me is wondering if it's cos he knows it's his long nighttime sleep and is a bit scared/worried about being alone, but I'm probably reading too much into it.
Mum to two wee boys
Back to Top
blondy View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 19 November 2007
Location: West Auckland
Points: 2608
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote blondy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 10:28am
As you know, Nat is only up for 2 hours during the day, but she has to be up from 3-4pm for her 7pm bedtime, otherwise won't go to sleep. we tried giving her a late afternoon nap for a couple of days (waking up around 5pm), and couldn't get her settled before about 9pm

at least he's self-settling ok during the day, but it's almost more frustrating that you know he CAN go to sleep by himself, but just won't!
Back to Top
xox6Girls1Boyxox View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 11 May 2008
Location: Tauranga
Points: 1163
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote xox6Girls1Boyxox Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 11:00am
Have you tried bathing him instead of showers? And does he have a cot mobile or one of those cot musical things that light up and play music? Maybe he gets bored when he goes down at night....By the sounds of it the curtains amuse him so he might just want something in the cot with him????
Back to Top
JessDub View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 29 February 2008
Location: Hamilton
Points: 323
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote JessDub Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 11:32am
Try and extend his bed time a bit and see if that makes a difference?

When DS is overtired, he'll wail and then be out like a light.

When DS is in bed too early, he'll wail and then lie in bed staring for an hour.

Back to Top
busyissy View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 16 January 2007
Location: Hamilton
Points: 675
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote busyissy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 6:44pm
Babies often go through an attachment phase around 6 months, it could be that he has just realised that you have left the room. Be careful or he will quickly have you trained and not the other way round. When our son was this age we started putting his teddy bear in the cot to distract him from the fact we weren't there any longer. Worth a try?
Back to Top
KiwiL View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 29 December 2006
Location: Wellington, NZ
Points: 2225
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote KiwiL Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 8:02pm
Fliss, I was wondering the same about Jackson. He always plays up for his 7pm (usually 8pm!!) bedtime, no matter how tired he is.

I wondered if he knows he is going down for a big sleep and that is why?

No tips, I am afraid, as we're going through the same thing. But I am interested in the replies! Hope you can solve it soon.
Back to Top
fire_engine View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 03 November 2007
Points: 6260
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote fire_engine Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 8:59pm
Hmmm, he went down magically tonight. He had a nap till about 6.30, then feed, dinner, play, feed, FF, story ... 2 hours in total. Not a peep out of him after we turned out the light.

Aggghhh, why can't they do it every time?!

And there have been a number of nights when I've PMSL at DH crawling out of the room so Daniel doesn't see him leave!
Mum to two wee boys
Back to Top
weegee View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 28 May 2008
Location: Kaukapakapa
Points: 4611
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote weegee Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 9:23pm
LMAO, great mental image of your gangly DH crawling out the door!!!

No particular advice, except to say JJ is exactly the same - self settles perfectly for every other sleep but we have a battle at bedtime at night. It is getting better, gradually - I used to have to feed him to sleep at night but don't any more. Just need to spend the last half hour or so of his bedtime routine in his room with minimal talking etc. I think there is a magic window of tiredness too, and it always seems easier when we've had a good day routine-wise.

Must have been something in the air tonight cos JJ went down easily tonight too!

Mum to JJ, 4 July 2008 & Addie, 28 July 2010
Back to Top
scribe View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 23 April 2008
Points: 1306
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote scribe Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 9:45pm
The image of Daniel looking around and smiling, when you pick him up, suggests to me that he's not tired enough. (Clara used to be exactly like that until we stopped putting her down for an afternoon nap.)

If you picked him up and he was grizzly with a fixed gaze and other tired signs, I'd think it was overtiredness instead.

Once we ditched the afternoon sleep - she's now awake from 2pm at the latest, till 7pm - we've found it much easier to get her to sleep (unless we've had a really busy day and sometimes she's overtired/overstimulated - yep it is a fine line sometimes!).
Back to Top
Shezamumof3 View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 14 April 2007
Points: 10096
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Shezamumof3 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 10:08pm
lol at your DH crawling out the room hehe, classic!

My guess would be that he isnt tired enough and maybe he needs to be up till about 7.30 then down for the night? Sometimes it just takes half an hour or so more of being up to tucker them out.

With Caden we dont really have a routine per se(apart from his shower with mummy and then bottle before bed and his music on etc), we go with how he is that night because if he has woken from his last nap at say 4pm there is no way he is going to want to go to sleep at 6.30, he will cry and fuss if i try to put him to bed, but if he woke from his last nap at about 2 or 3 then he will want to go to bed by 6.30 or 7 and will fall asleep quite happily. Usually he is down for the night by 8 at the latest, sometimes its later than that if he wont settle, and in that case we get him up for a play and that will tire him out and we put him in his cot, give him his cuddle toy thats for bedtime only turn his music on say goodnight and leave the room.

I also find that if he is overtired he will grizzle and cry for quite a while and just wont settle for ages, so I will either get him up and sometimes give him a little top of formula he then has a little play and thats enough to tire him out to the point where is is nearly asleep on the floor, or I will cradle him and hum and sing to him in his room with the night light on to settle him and that usually makes him all sleepy and relaxed.


Edited due to my crappy spelling! Time for bed me thinks!

Edited by Sheza

Back to Top
hannibal View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 04 December 2008
Points: 611
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote hannibal Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 January 2009 at 10:37pm
Hi

Try this great site www.thesleepstore.co.nz - it has some great tips. Bubs isn't the best sleeper during the day and I have applied some of the tips and she is a bit better - lucky for us she is a better night sleeper!
Back to Top
SarahP08 View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 06 March 2008
Location: Franklin
Points: 1002
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote SarahP08 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 January 2009 at 10:04am
I was having a huge problem too, Kailash would take over an hour to settle down to sleep at night. I used to pat him to sleep so he never really learnt how to go to sleep by himself. He'd also immediately stop crying and be all happy and awake as soon as I picked him up.

He's had a strict bedtime routine for ages but what I found worked for him (and it was so quick it was like a miracle) was giving him a blankie. I just got a square of muslin and wore it in my bra for a few days and then gave it to him at sleep times and now he goes to sleep all by himself. I just pop him in the cot, kiss goodnight make sure he has his dummy and blankie and then leave him to it.

This is his routine:

3.30pm (ish) up from last nap
6pm FF and solids
then bath
then cuddles and story
in bed by 7.15
10pm dreamfeed

since giving him a blankie he has also slept through the night 3 times (previously I was up 7-8 times a night to settle him)

I'd suggest maybe not tired enough, or needs comforting?


   
Back to Top
first View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 17 January 2008
Location: Auckland
Points: 1357
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote first Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 January 2009 at 10:07am
I have the same problem. Great sleeper through the day but come night time. WOW whole new baby. My DS will go to sleep really well then wake an hour later and want cuddles and feeding again. Sometimes he will do this hour sleep and awake again thing two or three time so I am no help to you whatsoever but just wanted to say yip I"m in that boat too.


Back to Top
tropics View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 25 February 2007
Location: New Zealand
Points: 2555
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote tropics Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 January 2009 at 4:15pm
we have the same problem - whats with these babies? Jaydens good during the day and at night      (Generally when DH isnt home!) can take ages to get to sleep lots of crying going in settling / putting dummy in etc - so no answers here im afraid!
[/url]
Back to Top
fire_engine View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member


Joined: 03 November 2007
Points: 6260
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote fire_engine Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 27 January 2009 at 4:37pm
It's reassuring to know that there are others out there going through the same thing!
Mum to two wee boys
Back to Top
KiwiL View Drop Down
Senior Member
Senior Member
Avatar

Joined: 29 December 2006
Location: Wellington, NZ
Points: 2225
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote KiwiL Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02 February 2009 at 8:57pm
Any progress Fliss?

Jackson gets so distressed when we put him down now at night. It's only this sleep that does it. Have tried cutting out his late nap, tried different soothing techniques... he just gets really upset and thrashes about in his hammock, and it feels as though it is getting worse not better.

If things are working better for you, I'd love to know what you're doing!
Back to Top
 Post Reply Post Reply Page  12>

Forum Jump Forum Permissions View Drop Down

Forum Software by Web Wiz Forums® version 11.10
Copyright ©2001-2017 Web Wiz Ltd.

This page was generated in 1.188 seconds.