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sharpie 
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 Topic: Green eyed monster **rant**
Posted: 08 October 2008 at 7:42pm |
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Hi anyone who needs to rant or doesn't mind listening.
Needed to rant to someone, and couldn't find a green eyed monster topic, so instead of thread jacking I thought I'd start my own.
I have just heard today that my brother in law and his girlfriend are pregnant after telling us all they were starting to try LAST MONTH!!
we have been TTC for 2 and a half years. I am 29 and she is 36. I am absolutly gutted. I just can't get over the unfairness of it all. I just wanted them to have to try a little bit harder. Why was it so easy for them?
This is on top of my sister and my partners sister both telling us they were preg in the last three weeks. Both of them already have children, can't they share? ... well that doesn't make any sense but I'm feeling a bit irrational about it all atm.
Anyone else in this situation? Please share, I feel like a good old b$#@ch session.
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chocol8
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Posted: 08 October 2008 at 7:49pm |
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I know what you mean Sharpie! Everyone around me seems to be getting pregnant at the drop of a hat at the moment...I'm of course very happy for them all but from a selfish perspective it's so frustrating!!
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Zina
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Posted: 08 October 2008 at 7:55pm |
Hey Sharpie - Big hugs for you  I'm sorry to hear how you are feeling. Life is really unfair sometimes and you are completely allowed to be feeling the way you are.
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AnnC
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Posted: 08 October 2008 at 8:04pm |
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I know how you feel Sharpe - not from personal experience but our friends are going thru it. They have been trying for agesnbut still no baby.
we are thinking of having another and will feel bad if we get pregnant before them - considering after saying Rhylz was out last.
We don't mean to be pregnant before them to up set them though...
Hugs I am sure you need it right now
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Ann
Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10)
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Vanillabean
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Posted: 08 October 2008 at 8:57pm |
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I completely understand where you're coming from, its been an 18 month journey for me so far and all my friends and many acquaintances seem to get pg at the drop of a hat. Sometimes I feel bad when someone gets pregnant straight away just because I know now that they won't understand how things are for me.
I really hope you get your BFP soon.
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5x mc, Jan 08, June 08, Nov 08, May 09, April 11
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caitlynsmygirl
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Posted: 08 October 2008 at 9:19pm |
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i cant say i truly understand how you feel , and id be lying if i said i wanted to...i really dont know how you guys do it, and i think your all incredible .
One thing ive constantly found since joining this forum, is how unfair life is, every time i hear of a child being abused or treated badly by its parents ,i think "the ladies on OB should have had that child "
Its not fair, and i hope and pray for all of you that are trying that you get your BFPs really soon
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WestiesGirl
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Posted: 08 October 2008 at 9:39pm |
 sharpie wrote:
I have just heard today that my brother in law and his girlfriend are pregnant after telling us all they were starting to try LAST MONTH!!
we have been TTC for 2 and a half years. |
Yep I can totally relate to this and it sucks big time!!! We found out that my BIL and SIL are pg (they are about 14 weeks now) but were 9 weeks when we found out and yep, same as you, only took them their first month trying. The crappy thing for us was we found out a month after we had MC'ed our own wee angel.
Big I hope you get your well deserved wee bubba soon Feel free to vent at any time too 
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Our Angel July 08  Gone but not forgotten
And to complete our family, our princess has arrived
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choco69
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Posted: 08 October 2008 at 10:07pm |
sharpie i know how you feel ... life has a way of putting people in front of us we just want to slap! (in the nicest possible way of course)
** quick rant **
one of my friends found out she was pregnant a couple of nights ago after what amounted to a 2 week stand, said she didn't want the baby, i offered to adopt it, she said no she couldn't do that, so had a termination all planned and then miscarried ... and she wondered why i was upset with her!
** rant over please continue with the previous conversation sorry for the minor hijack! ** 
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JadeC
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Posted: 08 October 2008 at 10:21pm |
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Oh no, that totally sucks. I don't have people in real life getting pg, just online, and it's incredibly hard. I can't imagine what it must be like to have family.
Hang in there.
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sharpie
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Location: Rotorua
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Posted: 09 October 2008 at 8:34am |
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Thanks everyone,
Its nice that you can get both sides of the story in here. AnnC, thanks for putting it in perspective for me. I know they don't mean to do it, how can they, noone in RL knows we are TTC. Its not their fault.
I need to find a way to get myself past this or I'm going to poison all the family get togethers.
Rianna08 I can't imagine the pain of a M/C. I think I should count my blessings. Perhaps its easier not to get preg than to lose a baby? I'm sorry for your loss.
choco69, that must have made you so mad. I think I would have found it hard to see that friend for some time if she had terminated. Is she upset about the M/C at all?
I am still struggling with this today, my partner does not understand the way I'm feeling and yesterday when he told me, it was my ov date. I was so upset and started a fight with him, which doesn't help with "the mood" and we didn't do the deed. So it looks like this won't be my month again, which obviously makes how I feel today just that much worse.
Thanks for listening again, Please feel free to leave your own rants, its always nice to feel outrage and sympathy for someone else rather than focus on your own worries.
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sharpie
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Posted: 09 October 2008 at 8:40am |
sharpie wrote:
, its always nice to feel outrage and sympathy for someone else rather than focus on your own worries. |
Sorry, I didn't mean it's nice, I mean its a welcome distraction.
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tiptoes
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Posted: 09 October 2008 at 9:43pm |
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Choco that sucks, I had a similar thing earlier this year when my sister got pregnant and terminated as it was a really bad time for her (marriage breakup + medical problems etc) I'm not upset that she terminated but just at the irony of the situation. Just didn't seem fair that I desperately wanted to be pregnant and she didn't.
So many of our friends have either gotten pregnant or had a baby in the last year and I'm happy for them all but just jealous and sad for me and wish it was me. I also wish it wasn't so easy for them and they'd quit telling me to relax as it will happen soon!
I get what you mean sharpie, as it's nice to not only have the distraction but to know you're not the only one.
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sharpie
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Posted: 10 October 2008 at 11:24am |
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Oh boy here I am again. I was just starting to feel better and I had a relapse! They've decided to tell everybody already, so my nextdoor neighbours just came over and said isn't it great about blah and blah (not their real names!) then she said, Must be your turn next!! Oh how I hate that statement. It was all I could do to mumble a maybe and shut the door in her face. I thought I would have three months to get used to this before I started getting that and the when are you... question. When will people realise how personal a question that is and NOT ask it!
But a funny story, I have decided that I obviously have issues with this girl in particular, that I am taking this preg news so badly and have decided to try and find a councellor. I rang the CAB and explained to the lady what I was looking for. She told me that if I babysat for a new baby for a week I would get preg. Thats all it took for her apparently. I haven't heard that one before and it gave me a giggle.
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AnnC
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Posted: 10 October 2008 at 2:13pm |
LOl must be the clucky hormones makes you more fertile??
Now just to find that newborn baby ....   LOL
I am sure your time will come --- sending heaps of preggie vibes your way
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Ann
Also Mum to Josh (15) and Brooke (10)
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Nutella
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Posted: 03 December 2008 at 1:23am |
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Sigh, I know this feeling. My cousin, sister, and three good friends are all preggers and we have been trying for over a year now. Seems so unfair when they have all had other kids and we can't even have one. When my sister told me I cried and felt so guilty that I felt jealous! It just seems so unfair that some people just have to blink and BAM they are pregnant. Ah well, we are going to the doctor tomorrow to discuss our current situation so maybe there will be some great advice...like keep trying!
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tiptoes
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Posted: 03 December 2008 at 10:40am |
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Good luck at the doctors nat, hopefully they're able to at least do some testing and come up with some answers!
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ooEvaoo
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Posted: 03 December 2008 at 1:58pm |
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Rant away!!. I think that the majority of people who fall pregnant and say "we weren't evern trying!" yadah yadah...actually have been trying for awhile, but want to present themselves as able to fall pregnant easily. When we had my son, he was a total surprise...and yes we weren't trying.....BUT...it was the result of over 12 months of majority unprotected sex!!. My cycle is pretty regular so kinda knew when to avoid doing the deed, but yes sometimes it's not failproof. It's fine to feel angry, jealous, resentful etc....it just shows how passionate you are in wanting to bring a child(ren) into this world. I do hope that you get your BFP very soon!
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Bobbie
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Posted: 03 December 2008 at 3:05pm |
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I can only imagine how you feel. I found it hard when my friend got preg first month trying and it took me 6 months - and that's only 6 months not 2 and a half years.
Mind you on the other side she was totally freaked about getting preg so quickly as she figured she'd have a few months of trying first.
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Flipsta
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Posted: 03 December 2008 at 3:10pm |
In the same boat Sharpie!
A very good friend of mine fell pregnant recently after 5 months of trying and DH and I have been trying for 13 months now and oh boy what a wave of emotions when she told me. Pure excitement then pure jealousy. I felt really awful
And I have bad thoughts sometimes when she tells me she is not excited about it cause she has morning sickness etc and I feel like snapping at her "at least your are pregnant so quit moaning!"....and then I say to myself did I just think that?? what is wrong with me. 
But there are plenty of us out there going through the same thing. That is the beauty of these forums.
Allows us to vent these things and know there are others that understand.
Keep the chin up and fingers crossed all of us get our BFP's soon
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AzzaNZ
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Posted: 03 December 2008 at 3:26pm |
Sorry Sharpie, I know exactly how you feel!
It took us two years to get preggie and everyone around me seemed to be managing accidentally. I remember a friend telling me she was preggie and I burst into tears (and I was happy for her but I was so tired of waiting for my turn).
The day after we found out we were preggie my SIL announced so was she, accidentally, and proceeded to b*tch and whine about how terrible it was and how having a baby was ruining her life 
I hope you get a big fat positive soon!
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Green eyed monster **rant**
