what should i do

hi im sorry if this has been done before but im kinda getting a bit stressed. my baby use to be a really good sleeper at night and ok durind the day but now he refusers to sleep for more then 20 mins during the day and wont sleep till late at night like 10.30 an last 2 nights he woke every 3 hours and he use to sleep about 8 in a row. my mum said to let him cry 1 min for every pound he is so i try let him cry for 16 mins but he gets so upset he starts to cough and choke and i get so worried. any ideas on what to do?

also he has now started to bite me wen he feeds and it hurts so much to feed him now, can i stop him from doing that? hes 11 weeks old
thanks

Firstly....

Now .. I personally wouldnt let a baby cry (but that is just me).

We went through a shocking stage with her and I did basically whatever it took to get her to sleep.

This included, putting her in a sling (if it was daytime) ... letting her sleep in my arms and there was a period when DH moved out of our bed and I slept with Issy.

They dont form "habits" till they are much older so I would just do whatever it takes to keep you all sane

I personally DO let mine cry.
We went thru a stage where Thomas wouldnt go to sleep unless he was being cuddled by me, and I wasnt getting anything done (your bub is 2 weeks older than Thomas) I just HAD to put him in his cot and let him cry. Eventually he learned that he was alright and nothing was wrong with him and he'd settle. Its most distressing when they cry and cough and carry on, but it's not doing them any harm.
EG: this morning. Thomas was fed at 3am (he's on 4 hourlys) and was awake at 6am crying. He went back to sleep within 15mins. He's just starting to wake up again now. Works just right :D

Can't help with the biting question - bottle babies here, but do you wrap your DS for sleeps?

I didn't really wrap Amy - first time mum, couldn't figure our how to get it to stay on! But with Sophie I had a great wrap that I bought from the Sleep Store and she settled really well in it.

Also what is your wee boy sleeping in - Cot, basket, bassinet? We moved both our two into their big cots at about 9 - 10 weeks. We had found with Amy that she was hitting the side of her basket with her hands and waking herself up.

If he hasn't been doing it for long it could just be the 3 month growth spurt happening. Maybe he just wants to feed more in the day and cluster feed in the evening, it might also be why he is biting if perhaps he is getting frustrated at the feeds. (or he might have just worked out that he can bite you so is ).

i dont want to come across as complaining. because i feel so lucky having him he really is my gift from god!

WIth the biting - I wonder if it's cos your letdown is slower towards the end, and he's getting frustrated that there's no milk (or not as much) coming out? If you think that might be it, you could do some things to up your milk supply... lots of protein, water, complan, bananas, even herbal supplements. It might not even be that, but just a thought.

Sleeping - my boy slept way better when he was wrapped so I think it's good advice to try that again. Does he have a dummy?

Oh and I know that my boy has often gone through different phases where, for no apparent reason, his sleeps just went crazy! I was sooo tired. But then again, for no apparent reason, they got better again. I think it coincided with him learning to roll over, just disrupted his sleep for some reason. It will get better!

Just had another thought - is he warm enough? Once we started putting a little oil heater on low all night, Harry slept much better. Also he has a sleeping bag which keeps him nice and warm.

And hey, it's not *complaining*, you're exhausted and you want to try and find something to help!!

Re: wrapping I found the instructions on the Sleep Store website great with the gremlins, Maya never got out of her wrap but Sienna was a real houdini but when I started following their instructions and using bigger wraps it was much more successful.

We started wrapping (and sleeping Daniel in a hammock) and he started sleeping really well, till he had a growth spurt 2 days ago. Last night was better, but the growth spurt "day", he would feed really frequently and only cat nap.   Ditto the Sleep Store instructions. We got one of their plain cotton wraps (1.2m x 1.2m) and it works brilliantly.

We do let Daniel cry (and he's only 2 1/2 weeks ), but not for more than 10 minutes. He also has a different cry between "I actually really need attention cos I'm hungry/hot/dirty/gassy" and "I'm overtired" which is more of a squawk. If it's a "really need attention" cry, I get him up within a couple of minutes. We only started letting him cry once we had feeding sorted, so we knew he wasn't crying cos he was hungry. Sometimes he just needs a wee cuddle.

Sorry - not much practical help there! But ditto the others - you're not complaining - this is what OB's here for!

Lil miss is crying atm, but it's a pretty half hearted effort, she screams for a minute or two then stops and then starts again. She's fed and changed and I've picked her up twice to wind her so now she just needs to go to sleep. My nanny just went in to put the washing away and she's like " baby can't even keep her eyes open she's so tired!"