Scary

Well, I just ordered the ovulation strips and the basal therm. Downloaded the charts too. Just have to wait till next mens to start as i'm all over the show just coming off the pill a few weeks ago.

Did anyone else have a freak out when you started your first TTC? I'm not really maternal but am aware of my age. This is all a tad on the scary side and i'm having doubts on if I can do it or not.

I know exactly where you are coming from Danaj, I'm older 35 this year, and while I am ready to start a family no question, I think its the feeling of letting go of the control I've had of my own life up until this point.

I'm such a planner, and babies are impossible to plan for, you don't alway conceive when you expect, and babies certainly don't arrive when you want them to either.

I know I keep putting it off each 6 months, when I renew BCP for one reason or the other.

I think motherhood and all it involves is a big leap of faith, you just have to go for it.

I wonder if with age, you have a greater understanding of what motherhood involves and what you are giving up to get there, which can easily explain the 'What am I doing' moments.

Hi Danaj, I know how you feel. I was in two minds when we got pregnant with our daughter, I was terrified, excited etc all at once because I thought I was not maternal enough at all.   Unfortunatly we lost her at 26 weeks. I relise that I was ready to be a mother, maternal instincts just kick in somewhere along the way. So we are TCCing again.

Thanks Guys. And Narissa, i'm so sorry to hear of your loss.

I'm 29 so not over the hill but old enough to be aware that time will catch up very quickly. I think you are all right in saying that it is the loss of control. I love our life. Every part of it and such a big change is scary. Perhaps I'm more afraid of the change than anything else. Perhaps I keep finding excuses for that reason. There will always be reasons not to, money, time, work etc but those issues will always be there. I just need to stop being a wuss.

I've just never been one of those people who adore babies and can't get enough of them. Don't get me wrong, I love babies but always liked being able to give them back. That's what I mean about not being maternal. I hope I don't offend anyone by saying these things but I guess we all look at it from different angles.

In my heart of hearts, I know this is the right thing and the right time to start TTC. I'm just a bit afraid of the unknown. I always have control over things and I can't control this at all.

I'm with you Danaj! It seems to be such a collosal decision, it makes sense to me to be nervous. But then again I fluctuate, half the time I'm so excited, the other half I'm freaking out!!

Hi Danaj. I posted a simliar thread a while back. It was like once you make the decision you go "holy heck what am I doing?". I think some women get it when they realise they are finally pregnnat too. Women like to worry and second themselves and so like everyone told me I would say what you are feeling is normal

I was playing with a 6 month old girl today. She was all giggles and smiles. Such a sweet wee thing. I just wanted to grab her and give her a cuddle. I think coming off the pill (other thread) is making me feel more settled and happy with the situation. I feel alot better about it than I did last week. Now i'm impatient!!!!

When DH said lets try now I freaked coz I thought it would be me saying lets try now.  But once we found out we were expecting I was over the moon...  throughout the pregnancy I had doubts and was scared I'm 37 and giving up the ability to just do as I please was one of my freaks outs.  But just the other night I said to DH I can't remember what I was worried about.  And truly i can't remember what my doubts were. Oh and I'm 37!