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TraceyA 
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Joined: 10 January 2008
Location: Motueka, Tasman
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 Topic: Just feeling teary
Posted: 06 February 2008 at 4:25pm |
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Hey girls,
I've been feeling a bit teary the last few days, I guess I do tend to be a little on the high emotion side life and being this time of the month doesn't help things. Reviewing the statistical chances of getting pregnant each cycle, feeling surrounded by pregnant women or new mums and bubs, and just basically feeling that I'm most likely not pregnant this time round again is taking it's toll I think.
I keep trying to stay positive, but having a hard time. BDing is becoming a little loaded with expectations and so I'm frankly not looking forward to months and months more of trying. I know this is a phase and it will pass but its just getting me down and I didn't really know what to do about it so I just thought I'd write you all a letter, aren't you lucky.
I wish I could just relax like my DH and take it as it comes, but I can't, perhaps because ultimately it's all about my body so I'm more attached to the outcomes and the processes, I don't know.
Anyways, I hope your all having a better week then me.
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Emmecat
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Joined: 30 April 2007
Location: New Zealand
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Posted: 06 February 2008 at 4:40pm |
Hi TraceyA, I'm sorry you're feeling blue- if it helps (and it probably won't), I do know what you're going through...as do heaps of the other ladies on here!! 
It doesn't seem fair and trust me, I have had moments exactly like yours and even more uncharitable ones where I'm afraid to admit I have judged and thought how unfair it is that young teenage girls get pg after one bad decision and here's me and DP trying after months and it not happening.  Not very nice of me I know, it just sometimes hits when I get anxious about BD'ng at the right times etc. The 2WW is really hard too.
BUT on the bright side, we have DP's who support us- even though they don't quite realise how anxious and time consuming the whole ttc is- and that statistics (such as they are) show that most of us WILL concieve the baby we so want at some stage. Not very consoling when you want to be pg RIGHT NOW (like I do), but heartening nonetheless I think? 
It's also good to be able to come onto this board and know that whatever we are feeling or going through, someone else already has or is as well. It's paticularly heartening when you see that someone is pg or now has a baby of their own! 
Hope you feel better babe....all I can suggest is a big cry, some good chocolate and a big cuddle from DP.
Take care of yourself.
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TraceyA
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Location: Motueka, Tasman
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Posted: 06 February 2008 at 4:56pm |
Thanks Emmecat, I think the very reason I felt it was ok to make this post was because I knew I wasn't alone in this. Everything you said helps just a little, your right about our partners and the hugs and the cry so that means you must also be right about the chocolate *grin*
I know what you mean about the "teenage pregnancies", they just infuriate you no end and when your feeling like I am today I tend to just dredge all the ones of known of up, and all the other unexpecteds and stupid oopses and want to squish them all - maybe I should get some stress balls, you know the squishy ones, write all the names of accidental pregnancies I know of on them and start pelting them at a brick wall   lmao!
Off to the shops on a choc run now (see and walking to them means exercise so the calories from from the chocolate don't count). 
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Emmecat
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Posted: 06 February 2008 at 5:03pm |
LMAO re the walking to get the choclate means the calories don't count!! Totally right BTW. heehee
Enjoy the choccie. You deserve it. And don't automatically assume you're not gonna get pg this month either...someone has to, and it may as well be you..or me...or both of us! Also think of the BIG rest you and DP can have now you've past ov......LOL means next time you do it, it'll be cos you both want to, not cos you have to haha And that's always fun.....
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Vanillabean
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Joined: 17 January 2008
Location: Wellington
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Posted: 06 February 2008 at 5:25pm |
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I totally get down about ttc sometimes. It really is stressful and the sex on demand thing is wrecking havoc with our sex life too (i.e. taking all the fun and good feelings out of it). I get upset whenever anyone tells me a)they got pregnant by accident or b)they got pregnant the first month they tried. I got pregnant for the first time last month (although it ended in a miscarriage) and one of the big feelings we both had was relief that we didn't have to keep ttc anymore. Oh well. The look at ttc as a merry go round. Timing BD is stressful, the TWW is stressful and getting BFNs is stressful but each month I have new hope that this time it might work out.
Edited by Vanillabean
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FionaO
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Posted: 06 February 2008 at 5:30pm |
Hi Tracey, been there, think its half the reason I joined this site. I am not telling friends of family we are trying i'm not entirely sure why, just want to keep it between us at this stage (and all of you,) we've been married 4 years and the other day I got an email from my dad saying this is the year of the granddad hint hint, I felt like writing back and saying its not for lack of trying!!
So yes I guess i'm just saying i know how you feel - chocolate really will help on days like today.
As for people will little tiny and amazingly cute babies, yes they seem to be everywhere.
So that is what we are all here for, support because we all know how this feels and on some days how frustrating it can be - but we WILL get there
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Emmecat
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Posted: 06 February 2008 at 6:11pm |
Aargh this ttc thing is doing my head in a little! Only an hour ago I'm posting some words of comfort to Tracey and now I"m the one who needs it! Posted it in the 2WW thread as well but am just feeling like a dick cos I went and tested at 5pm?! and got a BFN. The biggest BFN you have ever seen. Why did I do that? And why late in the afternoon at 11DPO?! Jeez. Feel like my body is playing tricks on me and maybe I'm not pg after all.
**Grumble grumble**
Edited by Emmecat
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TraceyA
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Posted: 06 February 2008 at 6:20pm |
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Ohh Emmecat, I'm sorry, the temptation can just get too much not to, I know, especially when you feel pretty sure this is it this time. Want some chocolate? *passes the Lindt balls*
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Emmecat
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Posted: 06 February 2008 at 7:16pm |
 TraceyA wrote:
Ohh Emmecat, I'm sorry, the temptation can just get too much not to, I know, especially when you feel pretty sure this is it this time. Want some chocolate? *passes the Lindt balls* |
Hey thanks Tracey....it just gets on top of me too...and doesn't take much!!
**grabs offered Lindt balls, shoves the entire lot in my face and walks down to dairy to get more**
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alexbabe
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Posted: 06 February 2008 at 7:21pm |
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Big huggles for all.
The reason i joined this site is because, a friend saw I needed to talk to women who are feeling the same way I do. Its really hard right now ttc, when someone at work is pg and have to look at her everyday.
I suppose at some stage we all need to cry and just let all the emotions out and not let it bottle up. When I get all emotional lately I look at it as a good thing, and that ttc is still what i want and every tear will be worth it in the end.
Hope everyone had a good relaxing day.
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Rashika
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Posted: 06 February 2008 at 8:23pm |
Big positive vibes to you all
I wish I could at least be TTCing with you all but no, I still have to wait for a bit till a cycle has passed, now THAT bit is really peeing me off... I just wanna get back into it, but partner says we should do the right thing and wait a month... bugger that I'm thinking, but cant do much with just me, so a little girl waits (or not so little girl)
I can understand the teary bit... today for me its been the 'angry at everything' bit, blowed if i know why, could be PMT or pre 40 year old blues, take your pick!
Edited by Rashika
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mylilmosaic
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Posted: 06 February 2008 at 9:41pm |
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Parki
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Posted: 07 February 2008 at 9:22am |
Sorry to hear your feeling this way hun...
I don't really have any advice sorry as I feel the same way every month :(
Just look after yourself and try to stay positive
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alexbabe
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Posted: 07 February 2008 at 10:56am |
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*big huggles to all*
may your day be filled with sunshine and happiness
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kobec
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Posted: 07 February 2008 at 2:04pm |
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Hey jaxs I am on weightwatchers too!!!
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The_Stuarts
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Posted: 07 February 2008 at 3:16pm |
Oh girls. I know how you're feeling. Once you decide it's time to start TTC why does it take so long. We spend all our early adulthood (and sometime late teens) preventing pregnancy only to find it's so hard to actually get pregnant.
Talk about uncharitable thoughts when I was TTCing I used to look at mothers with more than one child and think that they were selfish hoarding all those children to themselves.
Anyway, big hugs  and good luck.
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Just feeling teary
