Yet another sleeping question

Spencer would often lay awake for up to 40mins before going to sleep but I would leave him (not if he was crying though) if just awake and cooing or slight grizzling I would leave him. He is very active and alert or nosey if you like. I have found that he needs minimal distractions/interaction to get to sleep. So he goes into a darkish room with no toys in his cot, no music no anything interesting at all. His bedtime routine is this. If necessary change his nappy (normally only for night sleep), strap into safety sleep, kiss and leave room, anything more and he we will want to play etc, sometime he is still laughing, trying to suck on his feet etc, but I know he is tired so he goes to bed regardless. Now he will generally go to sleep within 5-10mins and will spend that time singing to himself, but at 2 months it did take him longer.

One thing I did was attack each sleep seperately and if he needed to come out and be cuddled to sleep for a sleep then thats what happened. In the first 3 months he spent as many of his sleeps on me or in bed with me as he did in his own bed. They are so tiny and is natural for them to want to be with you (IMO anyway)

As for the tired signs I know that I thought he wasn't tired but he was and I was misreading the cues, the cues are very much like hungry cues and until they start eye rubbing it can be hard to tell. So things to look for are the vacant stare and jerky movements, so she may appear to be wide awake and alert but if you watch does she zone out then get active? if so she is tired, chewing on hands can also be a sign as she is comfort sucking not hungry. Plus an hour may actually be too long to be up, try putting her to bed after 45mins instead. If she is sleeping through the night she can obviously self settle, but maybe finds the daytime too exciting to switch off.

Yeah she pretty much has done this the whole time, I think she was starting to settle into lying there nicely before we moved house when she was a few weeks old and having a new room threw her out.

She is definately awake, when she does the zoning out thing I put her down right away and that's usually the time it is okay for her and she'll have a little grizzle and go to sleep. Same with startling herself. I don't think I've ever seen her rub her eyes.

My guess is she is bored in her cot maybe? She seems to be a baby that needs quite a bit of stimulation to be happy, we just bought her a bouncer with lights, sounds etc because a plain one wasn't cutting the mustard. But then cot is for sleeping not playing so there's no getting around the boredom? I was thinking about getting a mobile that spins (she has a static one hanging there) but is that enforcing a rule that cot time should be fun?

It's so hard being a parent and knowing what to do!

I agree with cuppatea - they are instinctive and want to be with you.

I would recommend a pouch sling - I pop it on and Cohen falls asleep within a few minutes while I go about my thing - if I am out I leave him on me - if I am at home I wait for a few minutes until he is out and then slide the sling and him into bed.

Slings are really great for babies who protest at being left in cots and for those whom CIO doesn't appeal too. They also work well for really alert babies as they are happy to be near you watching all that you do from an adult height.

If you want to see how they work check out this website www.slingbabies.co.nz

Oh yeah 3boys I forgot about that, we didn't have a sling but a front pack and sometimes that would do the trick and allows you to still get stuff done if need be.

Daniel stopped doing the tired signs I was use to reading so I kept him up longer and did this for a couple of weeks and he became horrible to settle. I don't look for tired signs anymore, I just put him down after whatever time hes been awake now.

I removed everything from his cot bar blankets and I gave him a taggie blankie to suck and cuddle with until he falls asleep. Works great because it's not too much visual stimulation vs say a mobile, there's no way Daniel would ever go to sleep if he had a mobile in his cot.

Hey Porce - I've pretty much got exactly the same issues and I've decided to go to the plunket family centre.

I struggled all day yesterday to get her to sleep and she didn't sleep at all and got stupidly overtired.sigh.

I must admit is is quite reassuring to read that other mums have been letting their babes sleep on them etc. I did that all last week and it was nice to have cuddles rather than abandoning her to her cot... In saying that I do want a babe that goes to sleep nicely in her own bed and gives me time for other things.

I had one realisation this morning that might help tomorrow - I think I'm leaving her too long from when she first makes a noise in the morning. I think by the time I go in to feed her she is already tired...

Well Ruby wasn't awake when I woke up this morning but was starting to stir so when she did wake up I got in as quick as I could. I fed her both sides and managed to put her down again within around 35-40mins (she had a spill in her cot but I remedied that situation, luckily it was just as I had put her down). I retreated to our bedroom and spied via the monitor, she was happily looking at her toys talking to them and pretty much by the time she had been awake for an hour on the dot it all went quiet. So far she has been asleep for 4 hours!!! She never sleeps that long in the day! Will see how the rest of the day goes!

Swaddling is something she hates big time (I have read how supposedly all babies like it and if they cry it's probably something else) but she has hated it from birth, she is a little houdini and if DH doesn't do her safety sleep up properly she wiggles up the bed out of that too (I just checked her, she's wiggled up as far as bent knees hitting the safety sleep).

We have a sling that I use when we go shopping that she is cocooned in (she can't see out) and she goes to sleep in that but at over 5kg now I'm finding her a bit heavy. We also have a frontpack that DH uses and she sleeps in that too but not for so long.

I have tried the radio on quietly too but that doesn't work, will try it off the station perhaps (how can they like that, it would drive me insane!)

I will persist with the 45min max in the day and see how I go, if that fails I'll give Plunket a call and see when a parent's class is on for sleeping.

I don't have this problem but in Pinky McKay's book "Sleeping like a baby" (I am a big fan of this book) she explains that all babies are different and that one of her children (she had a few) didn't require a daytime nap at all. Is Ruby unhappy if she doesn't sleep? Do you think that she needs a nap or are you putting her down for a nap because that is what we mums are supposed to do? If she is happy during the day without having a nap then maybe she doesn't need one.

Otherwise have you tried a hammock? Not sure if she will be too big for one now but that is how I got Jack to nap during the day once he got too hevy for the sling. There are quite a few on Trade Me. We got one off there from Nature's Sway directly, it was a factory second but you would never have known

porcelina Plunket will do a one on one with you and go through a whole sleep routine for a full day. You and baby go there for the day and they will show you exactly how long to feed, play and sleep with baby. I know many people that have used this service and every single one has had amazing success from doing it!

I am just about at the point of going there myself as Lauren does not sleep for more than an hour at a time during the day!

I think Ruby has been taking lessons off Anyssa, she lay there for almost half an hour talking to toys then got bored and grumpy Am going to try feeding her again.

I think I'll give Plunket a call!