The dummy debate

My little angel Ruby doesn't like going for a sleep in the day anymore and basically uses my boobs as a dummy. We have bought some dummies for sanity's sake (and my boobs' sake!!) and Ruby is in her cot happily sucking on one.

I guess I wanted to ask who is/has used dummies and how much of an issue has it been for anyone who has had to wean their child off having one?

I don't know why I have such mixed feelings as I have worked in neonatal wards and seen how they can be a lifesaver for babies that won't settle well. How does everyone else feel about them?

Josh had one for the same reason as you. He gave it up about 3 months old no problems.

It's so good to hear that other parents have done the same thing for the same reason! Have already had the guilts over formula top-ups and don't need guilts over dummies too! So far no wails from her room which is great.

Everyone in my family is dead against dummies..but i have worked with many children and realise it's necessary for some children.. so i have one on hand just in case..I'm trying to do the my baby my choice thing... :) (if i tell myself this now when the time comes hopefully i wont feel too bad) so we will see how it goes..anyway I'm glad you posted this as I was interested in how others viewed this topic.. if he needs it i will be weaning him off young though as my friends 3 yr old just won't give hers up:(

I offered Ella a dummy when she was a couple of weeks old but she refused to suck it, as I never bothered again. When she got to around 3 1/2 months she discovered her thumb and now sucks on it constantly (me & my brothers all sucked our thumbs when we were younger but have never had any teeth probs).

Paige had one and threw it away at around 6 months never to be seen needed again........

Blake had one from word go as unsettled baby...still has it for sleeps and SOMETIMES to calm him down now and then....I will throw it out when he is two if he hasnt already given it up..Dont believe all the nonsense about weaning them etc. Expecting a few days of grizzle.... unsettledness but no big deal!

We used a dummy for Paris, and not for Ayja. The problems we had with using a dummy for paris was that i didn't really have her own feeding cues etc downpacked when we introduced the dummy. As long as you are sure as sure that she's fed and full and just being a bit of a whinge then it's ok.

Just remember she's still at the age where she'll prob be having a few growth spurts, I remember the 6 - 9 weeks time being full of them for both my girls.

We made rules about paris's one once she was a few months old, that it only be used for bed or for comforting when hurt or really upset, not just cos she liked to suck. This went well as she got older as we didn't have an issue with weaning, she was used to it only being for bed anyway and we already had a special cuddly toy she'd had for bed etc since really little so she still had one comfort thing.

It's about putting boundaries on their use.. same as in neonatal units. In ours once they are big enough to be demand feeding - we encourage parents to not really use them so often, just feed instead.

The other thing you could just re-check is that you are picking up on her sleep cues early on. We did the 1 hour turn around thing and always made sure they were back in bed before the hour was up, going to bed awake, despite them sometimes being bright-eyed and bushy tailed. If they didn't settle after 10 - 15 minutes I would get them back up for another 10 mins and see if they wanted a top-up then straight back to bed again.
So easy to get them overtired without knowing.

Sometimes they really do just need something to take their mind off the fact that they're supposed to go to sleep cos some kids will fight it like heck and just get crazy and dummies help break that cycle.

Edited by mum2paris

I was also dead against using a dummy and thought they were 'dirty' (I think my mother drummed that into me ). But we introduced a dummy to Rex when he was about 6 weeks old for the same reasons as you. I only used it in his cot. The way I looked at it, I had a quiet content baby rather than a crying baby - I felt better and I'm sure Rex felt a lot better too. When I realised this, I was much happier about using the dummy. As Rex got a little bit older, I stopped using the dummy when I put him to bed and only used it if he doesn't settle. Now I only seem to use it at night when (every so often) he wakes too early and I know he can sleep for longer.

I also found that the hour turn around time help to reduce the use of the dummy

Both my bubs have had dummies and Benjy still has his for sleeps or special circumstances.
I'm the same as Kelpa, if he hasn't ditched it before then we'll get rid of it at age 2.
With Ella it wasn't hard to get rid of, it genuinely got lost one day and she managed to have her day sleep without it so when I found it later I didn't tell her

my son is just over a year and he still has his. He rarely has it outside of bed time. I don't see the problem with it and if it makes you feel better research has shown that it may help stop SIDs.

My older 2 had one as well and each gave it up before they turned 2. I never got into giving it to them all the time and so it was purely for bedtime. even now if Rhyley is upset (hurt himself etc..) he gets cuddles not the dummy.

Don't feel guilty I would rather my kid took the dummy and had my sanity than sitting feeding all the time. beside she might end up suck her thumb ...and you do see kids still sucking their thumb after 5 (very rare will you see a kids over 5 sucking a dummy)

You can take the dummy of a child you can't take the thumb.