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Lisha
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Topic: I want to stop breastfeeding.... Posted: 05 January 2008 at 7:36am |
I am thinking of stopping altogether and going onto formula. Zoe has had a great start to life, she was a whopping 10lbs 10oz and now is nearly 12lbs and is only 1 month old. She is gaining alot of weight rapidly, and is a healthy wee bubba.
The thing is that we are having major issues with her wind as I am lying down to feed her. Using infacol all the time. I know that formula feeding her won't stop the wind.
Zoe is so different to Lucy who was a boob hog and breastfeed perfect, Zoe on the other hand is really fussy, and has just started to refuse the breast and this makes it really stressful for me and I know that she knows when I am stressed. She takes the bottle fine, so going to give it a trial run today.
But why am I feeling so guilty for wanting to make this change? I have good milk flow, just a fussy baby. I know that there are tons of woman out there that can't breastfeeding, and I am giving up!  I am not worried that we won't have a close bond as we do already.
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Kazzle
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Location: Porirua
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 8:24am |
(((hugs))) Lisha, you need to do what you think is best for you and bubs, and i know that people say breast is best, but i stop bf Rhiannon after 4 wks and there is nothing wrong with her at all.
As for the feeling guilty i think thats just a natural feeling that most if not all mothers go through when it comes to deciding whether to breastfeed or not.
Good luck today, i hope it all goes well
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Lisha
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 8:50am |
Thanks so much! so nice to hear that others are the same out there! **big hugs** to you too! How is the pregnancy going?
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Bumble
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 8:56am |
Have you thought of expressing and giving that to bubs??
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formerly known as "Bee"
Ethan ~ March 2003 Big 6 year old school boy!
Micah ~ Aug 2008 ~ Smiley pants who loves telephones!
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my2angels
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 9:08am |
i guess you have to decide to either feel guilty or be unhappy and personally i think you will get over the guilty feeling quicker than being unhappy, i know i did. You gave it a go, again more than i did and Zoe is not going to suffer if you stop. Just do what you feel comfortable. My only piece of advice is if you do decide to stop, dont let anyone make you feel bad, be confident in your decision and know you are doing whats right for you all. First time round with Kobe i let people make me feel horrible about it, with Addison I was happy with my decision, i knew she wouldnt suffer and i was just a lot more positive about it.
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ShellandBella
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 9:17am |
And the guilt does pass...I felt awful when I gave up breastfeeding, but it was more about how I felt, and not how Bella was. Zoe will thrive either way 
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Lisha
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 10:05am |
That's a thought. Got a breastpump from TM that doesn't even work, might have to get an electric one.
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floss
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 10:20am |
Big hugs I have just given up expessing for Noah & Lola mainly cos they both have reflux and needed the thickend formula, but I had the major guilts till I realised that I'm less stressed and they are much more happier with a less stressed mum, so don't feel bad she is going to thrive either way.
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Redbedrock
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 10:21am |
These days formulas are so close to breast milk that there is minimal difference, the guilt passes if you deal with it and you are stopping for yourself and not doing what other people feel you should do. It's not giving up or failing it making a positive decision. You could express and if you want to do that long term then from my experience an electric pump and a good book are the way to go, Neil used to laugh about me going to the 'dairy' each time I disappeared to express.
I hope whichever way you go that you end up with happy baby and most importantly a happy you, as one will lead to the other
Edited as English appears to be my second language today
Edited by Redbedrock
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Lisha
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 10:26am |
Haha, yeah off to milk the cows is what my sister in law used to say!
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Kels
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 10:40am |
I want to stop bfeeding too and the guilt I feel is unbearable when my son is tugging at my top and trying to flip himself sideways at my boob (hence why I am still feeding ) . I think deciding to give up at any age for any reason is a guitly process. Try not to beat yourself up tho, you are doing what is right for you and yours! Like Claire said, Happy mum=happy baby and vice verser
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Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs
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Lisha
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 10:42am |
I am seeing my MW for the last time next week, do I tell her or just leave it? nervous about telling her!
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Lisha
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 10:48am |
Thanks for your support all the same
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Rachael21
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 10:54am |
Redbedrock wrote:
These days formulas are so close to breast milk that there is minimal difference, |
Um no that is not true sorry
Anyway like what Robyn said don't let anyone make you feel guilty, be proud that you have grown her this big.
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miss
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 11:06am |
Liasha, if you really want to stop and are not wanting to talk about other ways to try and address the issues, then maybe don't tell the MW, just in case she is one who is really antoi formula. If she isn't then maybe tell her and she can suggest which ones to try (that might help with wind etc).
If you are still in 2 minds then discuss it with the MW to see what options she can come up with to address the issue.
in the end whatever you do has to work for you both. While I am now hugely pro breastfeeding, that is because it works well for me, I don't believe in people feeling bad for wanting to do the best for their babies (which sometimes means doing the best for themselves).
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cuppatea
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 11:09am |
I expressed full time for a while, I started with an avent manual pump (that i had bought to the odd bit of expressing) and then when I stopped latching him altogether I got a medela double electric one from breastmates. It worked really well and only took 10mins to express. I learnt to balance the bottles on my knees so I could read my book...haha.
I did feel really guilty when I stopped but it was the best decision and I know feel good about it and that i did the right thing by stopping.
Breastmilk is better than formula but I think it is less important that having a happy healthy mummy.
Oh and with the midwife, I would talk to her she may have some suggestions for you and hopefully she will be supportive and if not who cares you won't be seeing her for much longer.
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babyg
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 11:40am |
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my2angels
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 12:28pm |
Lisha what is your midwifes opinion on bfing? I know my first midwife really pushed me too, but my midwife with addison was just like oh well you know whats right for you so just do what you feel comfortable doing. Your the one who has to do it so you need to be happy.
I was told by a paed doctor that the forumlas are perfectly fine for babies, close to breast milk and not going to do any harm.
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Lisha
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 1:37pm |
I have one big boob at the moment, should I be expressing this one and still giving it to her?
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cuppatea
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Posted: 05 January 2008 at 1:45pm |
I would try not to express from it as you may end up producing more cos of taking more out of it. I would just keep swapping sides at feeds and hopefully it will settle down. If you are getting sore though just use a warm flannel or express a bit off in the shower.
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