Dummy Rules

Hi Ladies,

I've tried a search for my particular problem but could not find anything overly useful. Sorry, if it was discussed earlier and I missed it!

We started using a dummy with Nina at around 2-3 weeks. She was/is quite a touchy/unsettled baby since birth and we had lots of tears and screaming ever since.

She loves her dummy but I'm concerened about MY usage of it as I've fallen into the habit of popping it into her mouth anytime of the day. She pretty much cries/grumbles always unless I hold her, I actively play with her or she's deep asleep.
I really don't want to shove it into her mouth all the time but it seems to be the only thing that will keep her quiet if I need to put her into her rocker or hammock to do things! She's terrible at amusing herself for any length of time, even with toys or while watching me do chores.

I use it after feeds also to keep her food down (she's got quite the reflux and is on Gaviscon and Ranitidine) because if she's active and moves a bit she spills the lot.

Do you have dummy rules? Do you only use it at certain times/events??

I'm also sick of constantly put it back into her mouth if she looses it, sometimes up to 15 times!

I feel quite guilty about this as I know it's my fault.... How do I get out of this??

for us we use it only at night.. though when E was tiny we used it all the time til he was about 4-5 months old.. then it became a bedtime only rule for similar reasons..he wouldnt lie there on the floor or anything really without grizzling.. and i used to put dummy in all the time..and i was concerned i was reliant onit.. and it was fine without it..though took some getting used to for me to accept grizzling etc was ok:) with Liam he hasnt take one(I triedddddddd!!) but he lies happily for as long as you leav ehim on the floor so not sure if it's related...? anyway its up to you..we do however now have an over two year old who doesnt want to get rid of it:)

T_Rex wrote: If it helps with the reflux, go with it. Reflux is hard enough. You can look at reducing the use of it when the reflux is better

Agree, and she is still really little.

We didnt want to use one either but had to for medical reasons and it also said to help prevent sids and some babies have an urge to suck up to 16 hours a day, Id rather that than be a human dummy

The early months can be hard enough as it is , is worrying about a dummy worth it?

You could try giving a teething toy or a cuddly toy for during the day and save the dummy for sleeps

We bought dummies because C refused to sleep unless he was on me. Our rules were for sleeps only, or if he was screaming on a bus or something. He only took it for a week before he decided he was a big boy and didn't need it (and all of 4 weeks old!) and now he only takes it maybe 1 time in 10 that we offer it.

In saying that though your bubba obviously likes her dummy and at 10 weeks there's no real issue.

If you're worried you're over using it you could try bedtimes and after food only?

JULIAandHIAWATHA wrote: She's terrible at amusing herself for any length of time, even with toys or while watching me do chores.

Shes 10 weeks old!! She wont be able to amuse herself. She wants/needs mummy! Some babies want contact way more than others, both my kids have been like that, and even now my 3 1/2 yr old will only play happily on her own if shes in the saem room as me!
Have u tried wearing her in a wrap or carrier? She will be snug close into you where she wants to be, can litsen to your heart beat like she was used to in the womb, be upright which will help her reflux and make her more comfortable, and u will be able to get stuff doen too! Worked brillantly for me and my wee man!

DS was a reflux baby and the dummy helped.

When he was under 3mths I gave him the dummy more, because he was more unsettled.
As he got older (lol, 4mths+ is old) I started to restrict it to sleep times only.
When we're out, he only gets it if it's his nap time and I'm hoping he'll fall asleep.
At home it lives in his cot, so he can't have it unless he's there.

I think it wasn't till about 5 or 6 mths that he could reliably put it back in himself.
Now we've got these flat bunny snugglies, which I've attached velcro to the paws and the dummies get attached to that. Helps in find it in the cot.

Before then, I was constantly putting his dummy back in.

noisybaby wrote: Do what helps you to keep sane. Worry about getting rid of it later. Your sanity is the most important thing at this stage

totally agree with this post

She wouldnt go back to sleep with the dummy if she was hungry, so I would give her the dummy and go back to bed!
Often the reason babies wake around 3 or4am is cos they are cold.

Hi JuliaandHaiwatha

I think it's fine to give her the dummy at 3am if she doesn't seem hungry. My son is 10 weeks old too and he wakes up regularly at 3am. A couple of mornings I've been slow off the mark to wake up and by the time I've got his bottle ready and gone to his room he's gone back to sleep. There were also a few times when he refused to take his bottle, and when I put him back down in his cot he dropped straight off to sleep!

He won't take a dummy, but now when he wakes at 3 and is just grumbling/protesting, I wait a wee bit to see if he settles and goes back to sleep and he generally does and sleeps to somewhere between 5 - 7. When I give him his bottle then he drinks it, but doesn't gulp it down like he's starving and he usually won't finish it either.

I work on the basis that if he's hungry he'll let me know and won't settle back to sleep!