Postpartum repairs - bum issues 4 months later

Hi Everyone,

This might get graphic - sorry!

Reaching out to see if anyone has had a similar situation after giving birth & if you have any advice for me!

I gave birth vaginally to my first son in May and suffered a 3b tear after a mediolateral episiotomy - tear affected the right side and tore my anal sphincter. The repair was successful and my perenium healed within about 8 weeks. My back passage, on the other hand, has continued to be a massive issue.

I've had chronic constipation since I gave birth, and even the laxatives did nothing to relieve it. I've found coming off them have given me some degree of softness and ability to go potty again, however it is still so painful I have to stomp my feet and remind myself to breath to get through any bowel motions. I often still tear during each motion and will have fresh blood.

My OBGYN said at my 6 week discharge appointment that this is the opposite problem that they would expect me to have and that I should feel lucky that I don't have incontinence instead - something they expected given the extent of my tear. (Which trust me I am thankful for - I was downgraded from 4th degree to 3b after the repair!). She advised I just get my GP to refer me to a perionatologist(?) in a couple months if I was still having problems, which I am having done tomorrow as I am reaching breaking point mentally about this!

My question to other is: DID THIS HAPPEN TO YOU? Or something similar? And what was done about it?
I am nervous that they have "stitched me together too tight" and I will need more surgery.