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Forum LockedDysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex (D-MER)

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mamanee View Drop Down
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    Posted: 24 April 2010 at 11:33am
I have FINALLY found what it is that I am suffering from!

Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex is a newly recognized condition affecting lactating women that is characterized by an abrupt dysphoria, or negative emotions that occur just before milk release and continuing not more then a few minutes.

The negative emotions, or dysphoria, that a mother with D-MER experiences often manifest "in the mother's stomach" - a hollow feeling, a feeling like there is something in the pit of the stomach, or an emotional churning in the stomach. Mothers report varying types of emotions with D-MER ranging from dread to anxiety to anger, these emotions fall on the D-MER spectrum which has three different levels. The common thread between these levels, is the wave of negative emotions or dysphoria, prior to letdown, when nursing, expressing and with spontaneous letdowns, that then lifts within another 30-90 seconds, and then usually repeats with each letdown.

A key piece of D-MER is that a mother with D-MER feels absolutely fine except just before her milk starts to flow. D-MER is a brief feeling, not more than 30 seconds to 2 minutes, only and always beginning before let-down. This is not postpartum depression and most of these mothers feel perfectly fine except for that pre-milk moment. A brief interval after the negative feelings appear, the milk begins to flow.

D-MER can easily go unrecognized since 1) some mothers have so many closely spaced letdowns per feeding that the feelings do not have a chance to dissipate before the next D-MER is upon her, making her feel that she experiences on long D-MER through most of, if not all of, the feeding 2) many mothers do not physically feel a letdown in their breasts and so does not connect the feeling as to being just prior to letdown and 3) given the fact that D-MER happens with spontaneous letdowns as well, a mother may not immediately connect the way she is feeling to being a breastfeeding phenomenon.

100% exactly what I have.   Horrible, but good to find out why the bloody hell I feel like this sometimes.    For me it's a feeling of dread/sadness/anguish and like I'm a horrible/disgusting/immoral person who doesn't deserve love or happiness.   And it only last for a minute or less!

Please tell me there are others??!
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Jaxnz1 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jaxnz1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 April 2010 at 12:09pm
I can kind of relate to this actually. I remember feeling a weird feeling in the pit of my stomach just before a feed and I dreaded DD waking up to feed.
But I can 100% relate to the not feeling any letdown AT ALL. I have never experienced it.
I'm sure DD picked up on my anxiety too, she just wouldn't stay latched on. That and my supply was really low.

So what now? Do you carry on and can they treat it? How did you find out about it?

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Delli View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Delli Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 April 2010 at 12:31pm
As I said in the other thread - I used to get this too. Never thought to look it up as I thought it was just me! Never thought it would be an actual condition that lots of women get - I've never heard of it before. Luckily I don't get it very often anymore. I really feel for those that get it the whole time they are breastfeeding!

I was glad to read this sentence on the website:

"Simply put: D-MER is physiological, not psychological. It is hormones, not past experience or repressed memories, that cause it."


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E&L+1 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote E&L+1 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 April 2010 at 1:57pm
Hey mamanee you might be interested in this story

There are heaps of inspiring breastfeeding stories on that site

Edited by EsmesMum
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mummyofprinces View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummyofprinces Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 April 2010 at 3:00pm
OMG I thought it was just me... I have never understood how people love breastfeeding.

I get a wave on anger and disgust that really does only last a minute or 2 but it made me dread feeding.. I sucked it up and got on with it but its nice to know I am not a freak.

Thanks for that nee!


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