Coffee Catchup 9th September with Dorothy Waide

Hi at 4 months ideally your baby's awake time is around 2 hours maybe stretching to 2 1/2 hours and by the time he is six months old he is ideally have awake times of 3 hours.

So if your baby wakes at
5.30am feeds

7.15am top up
7.30am nap - minimum 1 1/2 hours resettle or he can sleep longer

9.00am feed
10.45am top up
11.00am nap - minimum 1 1/2 hours resettle or he can sleep longer

12.30pm Feed
2.15pm top up
2.30pm nap minimum 1 1/2 hours resettle or he can sleep longer

4.00pm Feed
Bath, top up

6.00pm bed for the night

I always attempt to resettle during the night.   Depending on how long you take to resettle during the day then this is what you would do at night.    I will always feed a baby if they are hungry but in some cases they just need reassurance and go back to sleep.

Your question how do i get him to sleep longer is by teaching him to fall asleep and then stay asleep. Sleep is a learned behaviour and babies only learn to self settle and resettle through you being repetitive and consistent.

At the end of your question you mention 4 weeks so I am unsure how old your baby is so if your baby is 4 weeks old then ideally he is only up for 45 minutes to an hour and sleeps for a minimum of 1 1/2 hours. The notes that i have posted for settling and resettling for another question can be used for 4 weeks however the settling and resettling is done in arms ideally.   - If your baby is 4 weeks and you would like the settling and resettling notes for this age then please either email me or repost (if possible) and I will send them to you.

With regard to a routine at 4 weeks the routine is that he wakes, you respond, you feed, he sleeps. The consistency is that his awake times are around 45 minutes and his nap times are minimum 1 1/2 hours

Hi i have posted two general charts earlier so take a look at them and see if that helps.

Basically I believe that it is important to offer the breast before they go for their nap. The trick is not to let her fall asleep so my suggestion is to offer the feed, then sleeping bag and then into her cot.

The next step is to use the settling and resettling guidelines that I have posted and be consistent for as long as it takes.

IF she does not like cupping then you need to figure out what else she will respond to. Some babies respond to just having your hands on them, others like to be stroked down between their eyes or at the side of their eyes. Some babies just like your presence.

Whatever you choose to do you need to take the time as it doesn't happen overnight.

Hi Michelle
Do you have the additional thin mattress that you can put in the porta cot. If not then I would suggest purchasing one and then use the porta cot at home until he becomes comfortable with it. Which porta cot are u using. Some of them are very small so wondering if he is not liking the space limitations.

HI I have posted a couple of guidelines for mixed feeding already and also my notes on introducing solids and vegetables. Take a look at those and I think you will find that they will be helpful.

With regard to the dummy the way to wean him off is not to stick it in his mouth constantly and as soon as he goes to bed. Leave the dummy in the cot and only use it for the cot.

Also allow him time to self settle without it and also resettle without it. IF he doesn't self settle or resettle then let him have it but over time he will learn to fall asleep without it and also resettle. ALso if you are swaddling them it might be the time to un swaddle or do the angle swaddle see my website so that he can find his thumb.

I would also recommend only having cereal in the evening and mornings at this stage and when he is ready for the third meal of the day then introduce vegetables at lunchtime. The risk of offering foods such as avocado in the evening could result in an unsettled night if the food you offer reacts on him.

With regard to breakfast had he just finished a full feed and also how long had he been up for -- he may have been over it when you decided to offer it.

HI I have posted quite a bit of information that will help you with you questions. Have a read of the notes and then email me your phone number if you would like and I will give you a call. I am unsure of what you are meaning re the solid, ebm and milk and happy to have a chat with you.

The routine you have at the moment is fine as eventually the 5.30/6.00am feed will get later in the mornings and the rest of the day will move as well.

You havent mentioned how old he is - I remember your baby but not his age.

Hi Ladies
Thank you for all your questions and hopefully the answers will help you. It was lovely to meet you all at the OHBaby Coffee Catchup.

Remember before you do anything STOP, THINK, and ACT – work out what you are doing, why you are doing, and what you are trying to accomplish and then act.

Remember YOU are the baby’s mum and so listen to your heart and instinct.   Yes, we all don’t do it by the book, or get it right the first time, but you need to make ‘mistakes’ to get it right for you.   It’s a time of learning a little person’s personality and figuring out what works for your home life.

If you have the time I would love to see you pop over to http://www.facebook.com/BabyWithin
and 'like' it. You can then keep up with information that I post from time to time or hear from other mothers who write on the wall.

Please remember as a parent or carer that you should understand and acknowledge that Dorothy is NOT a licensed medical doctor or other licensed medical provider and the information that I share with you has come from experience and working with numerous families and babies and toddlers

email me at dorothy@babyhelp.co.nz and i will send it direct to you